Woes of Sadness
by marina star
Summary: Hermione hides herself from everyone except a certain Slytherin. She has a secret no one can find out and he's got a secret that she accidently walks in on. HUGE TWIST.Drama first, then Romance, then Drama again and then we'll see.
1. Suffering and Longing

She sat there deciding what to do. All the pain, all the misery, she wanted to destroy that, if not that then at least be free from all those problems for at least 5 minutes. 5 minutes of joy and freedom, 5 minutes of longing to the land of no one, the land of solitude. And yet this land is far from reach, although she can cut her wrist and start the longing and eternal process but she chose against it…until now. Her days are like routines for her, she awakes to a screaming sound coming from her parents bedroom, she listens quietly dares not to move, dares not to break the yearning silence, only hears her heart rate. She listened cautiously and heard moans and violent crashes, not knowing what to do she stays there, sits there like its natural. To her it was natural, to her it's become a habit. Suddenly her thoughts were being interrupted by her father's insensitive voice.  
  
"Where are you girl?" he screamed.  
  
Terrified of what her fathers actions might turn out to be, horrified by what the outcome may result to she panicked and ran straight to her bathroom which was located on the left side of her room, somewhere where her father hasn't come across yet. She closed the door in such a fierce way and locked herself inside. She prayed, prayed so hard that she will wake, wake from this unforgettable dream. She prayed that all the screaming and torture would stop. In a quick action she closed her ears using her white trembling hands as shields from the loud noises. Her bushy brown hair slightly falling in her eyes, covering the sweat dripping from her forehead. She shuts her eyes so tight that she has never seen such darkness in her life. Once time has passed, she slowly opens he eyes only to see her bathroom door shaking from the grunting sounds coming out of her fathers mouth. She continues to hold her hands covering her ears, afraid of what her actions may result to. And then it all stops, she's dumbfounded, she slowly releases her head from this incredible pain and hears silence. She's alone, for once she's alone, but no, not just yet. Her problems, her misery, her perpetual pain that still lingers in her heart. She's in deep pain, she's lost it. Hasn't smiled in weeks, hasn't eaten in days. Large, deep, blue bags under hey eyes from lack of sleep and a swollen face from all that crying. She was afraid to take a step up and look at herself in the mirror, she hasn't seen herself in days. She hated her life, she wanted so desperately to disappear, to disappear from the world, from her parents, from life. She had nothing to live up to. So there she stood, looking at herself in the mirror, petrified by what she has to face. She wanted so much to destroy that image, to erase it but couldn't find a way. Unable to movie with both hands on opposite sides of the sink. Face lowered from her gaze, this lonely 16-yr-old girl stood there, reminding herself that in just a day she would have to face her school mates. She wouldn't have to deal with her father's wrath, she wouldn't have to hide nor cry. She wouldn't almost be set free. With all these thoughts running through her head she looked up one more time just to see maybe she did have something to look up to, maybe she wasn't that bad, but no, none of the good thoughts came through. Frustrated her breathing level increased, her blood rushing up to her face, she knew that sooner of later people will know the true person behind the mask she wear's, people will know that she's a desperate, lonely, depressed, and a lost girl. She would have to face her school mates, she would have to be forced to smile, when really all in all she was unable to. She would put up and act just to please them, just to become what she always dreaded, a fake. All of the sudden her actions are not in control with her mind. With all her power she takes her right hand and punches the mirror using her fist. Shooting, sudden and terrorizing pain shot up from her wrist to her arm. This numb and painful feeling spread all over her body, paralyzing her from any movement. Her knees weakened by the shocking pain, she feel to the ground. At first came pain but then she wandered off somewhere deep in her mind, somewhere where her problems are lost, where she's set free. Where she cant see or hear that haunting voice that comes after her every now and then. Slowly she feels her eyelids getting heavy and she starts to close them knowing that once she awakes everything will come back. Her fears will come to disturb her once again, and she will once again be set into deep depression of misery. But for now she wanted to enjoy this moment. Just once in her life, she wanted to fly, she wanted to feel the breeze slightly caress her cheek as she would fly though the deep fog that sleeps upon her cold street. Slowly closing her eyes she blacks out and all there is, is white beautiful light and her mothers face glowing from the sky as if she were and angel. Her beautiful fair, white, skin glowing with an outline of yellow sunshine surrounding her. Her beautiful long, wavy, and golden hair that gently covers her delicate features of her face. It looked like she way saying something but no words came out, it's as if she were inaudible and unheard. She started to fade away but right before she left she slowly put her right hand over her heart and whispered a single word. And just as her face has left my eyesight, it was exchanged with a sudden blackness with my fathers figure towering over me. Suddenly my body starts to tremble all because of this monstrous person who dares to call him my father. Real fathers don't beat their only daughters just to get his anger out. He's caused so much destruction that one day he might end up killing me from the torture he gives me. 'But isn't that what I want, is to die' No, I will never let my father see me cry. The day I cry will mark the day when I die. I'm a much stronger person than he will ever be, I would never sink to such a low level as him.  
  
With a harsh pull back to reality, I awake. I look down at my once bloodied hand only to find it clean with no marks of scratches or bruises. As I look around I find myself sitting in a pool of blood and yet I'm clean.  
  
'How could that be? It's impossible, and the pain, it's gone' I thought to myself.  
  
As my eyes travel around the bathroom I stumble across a piece of mirror, it is the mirror that made me bleed and made me see the reality. I look up only to find the same mirror being broken in half and only in half.  
  
'I don't understand, last thing I remember was me punching the mirror so hard there were pieces of it everywhere. Its broken in such and even half' I thought.  
  
The mirror was broken in exactly two even sides. She couldn't come up with any explanation as to why or how that happened. I opened the bathroom door and duck my head into my bedroom, checking for any signs of my father. It's strangely quiet so I take this opportunity to walk out and finally relax and collect my thoughts.  
  
I observed my room and found it in a terrible condition like someone has been here looking for something and I have so many visions rushing through my head. Immediately I rush to my closet, open it and stick my hand on the furthest shelve there is. I grab this box and open it. Inside I find out that they, whoever it was, didn't take what was inside this box. I look through it and find a long stick figure wrapped in a long velvet cloth. I untangle it only to reveal a silver blade which was covered in green emeralds. It also had weird shapes carved on it, but there was this one that stood out and it was a figure of a snake which was faced to your right showing you only one of its green eye. It seemed to be looking right at you even if you put the knife somewhere else, it always seemed to be looking at you. There was something definitely strange about this snake. It also seemed as if this snake came with another pair. In back there were words carved in as small as possible, almost impossible to read.  
  
````(He who must be your second shall receive the other half of this. Must not fool the deep decided faith that beholds your future. Must not select another path. What's there shall be kept in place. Nor should never break apart)````  
  
She put the blade down. Even thought she had this sudden urge to blast the thing right in her wrist just to make everything alright for those wonderful 5 minutes. Deep down in this same box there was pictures of her mother. She looked at it and let a single tear roll down her soft white skin. Her mother died 2 years ago in a car accident. If it wasn't for that sick man she called father once, her mother would still be alive and safe. No, no, he had to call her and tell her to come home as soon as possible just because of some petty news about his brother being caught and sent to Jail.  
  
Hermione's P.O.V  
  
Oh so much I dread that day when my mother crashed with this van and no one was there for about 2 hours. So many images came back to me rushing through, to this day I still remember the whole incident like it was yesterday. For these 2 long and terrorizing years I have been beaten, wounded, and sexually abused. Of course I still had my pride with being a virgin but that didn't stop my good for nothing father who made me do some errands just to please him. How I wish I can have my normal life back, the one where I woke up to a lovely smell of pancakes and syrup, the one when I heard my mothers laugh ringing through my ears. When I saw my father smile at me for my good grades that I brought home. Those days are much to over now and there is absolutely nothing I can do right now to get them back. Killing myself will not cause any chaos, as much as my father loves me he could care less about me and yet again he still wants me living with him just so he can have something that he can take his anger out on. I'm a living target for him and he doesn't seem to even notice my bruises that I already know how to conceal from other seeing it. He could care less about my aching body which is sore everyday when I go to sleep. As I think about all of this I notice that now I no longer have the pictures in my hand but this glowing knife which reflects myself. As I observe it closely I see a horrible image of a lost and weak girl who sits there staring back at me with wide eyes. I take this knife and put it to my wrist and I feel the cold metal against my skin. It feels good and yet im still miserable. I apply pressure to the knife and next thing I know I see bright red blood slowly rolling towards my fingers I hold up my hand and put it against my mouth. I taste this red liquid suddenly feeling heavy and slowly start to close my eyes. As I drift off to a long dreamless sleep I feel a soft hand touch my bloody wrist and with a quick motion this gentle touch disappeared.  
  
I awake only to find sun shining through my covered windows, why cant the sun just go away and leave me in my darkness where I belong, where my future beholds. It's now directly shining right at me as it telling me to get up from my pool of misery. "Oh no, school's today"  
  
Like a ton of bricks have been crashed on me, I jerk up from my bed and start to gather all of my belongings. Rethinking what exactly it is that im going to do once I get there and how will I be known as the same old bookworm, know-it-all mudblood Granger.  
  
2 hours later I have packed my trunk and now the hard part is getting away from my lovely father. I cast a spell on the trunk, making it small enough to fit in my bag. I look out and find my house strangely quiet, as I walk across my hallway my walking increases. The thought of my father catching me is horrifying. I get out of the house safe and sound and catch the next KNIGHT BUS.  
  
As I reach Platform 9 ¾ see the famous Hogwarts train with fog steaming out of it. I undo the spell for my trunk and put it along with the others.  
  
I see no red head or jet black hair so I assume they will come later, right now I wanted to get some sleep knowing that the ride will be for hours. I slowly walk through the compartments trying to find a single compartment which doesn't include anyone occupying it. I reached the last compartment there is and slowly open it, hoping that no one will be there. To my surprise it was empty.  
  
I rush to the side of the compartment and sit there thinking how my last year at Hogwarts will be. Being head girl meant a lot for me. It also meant that I will have to work twice as hard as the rest of the kids and I will do more work than anyone else except of course head boy. "I wonder who head boy is" I thought to myself. Just as I thought this the compartment door slips open and a tall masculine boy walks in. I turned my head slowly away from this unknown boy, knowing that once he will see me he'll run away to his little friends and come back later to tease me or say something to me. None of this happened and although I was astounded by the maturity level of this unknown boy I never expected this to happen. He slowly closed the door and sat on the opposite side of me just staring at me. I never leave my gaze looking out the window and just observing the rain that poured down on the window as if someone up there was crying. Then I remembered my mother and I knew that she was always up there watching over me and whenever it rained I had this feeling like she was in pain and that she needed me as much as I needed her. She's up there crying, but for who, and the answer was once again so clear to me, she's crying for me, her only daughter , Hermione Granger. I didn't even realize but I felt a tear slide down my cheek. As soon as I felt it, I felt a cold hand wipe away my single tear. I looked up and locked eyes with none other than Malfoy, Draco Malfoy. I look deep into his dark blue eyes and start to wonder whats happening. And then I finally came to my senses and realized that Malfoy, the person who I loathed all these years of school, the person who tortured me about my being raised in a muggle-born family, has just wiped away my tear and still kept his hand there. In one quick motion I jerk his hand away from my face and get as far away from him as possible.  
  
"What are you playing at Malfoy?" I said in a harsh voice. 


	2. New Discoveries

As I entered the compartment, I stumbled across a young girl hid her face just as I was about to look at her. She was dressed in a black sweatshirt and faded loose jeans with a black belt which had diamond shaped studs on them. She had long beautiful brown hair and she also had black boots on. This mystery girl sat in this position like she just didn't care for others, like no one was there but her and her only thoughts. She positioned herself in the corner of the compartment. I watched her just staring out the window, and then it hit me , she was observing the rain and how it was dropping. In a minute or so she reached out her hand and touched the glass almost wanting to feel the rain itself. It felt like someone was talking to her out there, that's why she was so observant and accurate. Then out of nowhere I saw a single tear roll down her cheek. I hated it when girls cried. It reminded me of how my father used to beat my mother when he was angry or whenever he just wanted to get his wrath out of him. My mother and I are like targets for his heartless soul. He can catch us anytime and no matter how hard I try fighting it only causes me more pain and suffering. Whenever I try to help my mom, he always gets back at her and hits her even more harder than he did before. The scenes that occur in my house are haunting me every day in my sleep, every minute of my living day, every thought that enters my mind will include him, the enemy of mine, the torture to all, my only father, Lucius Malfoy. I hate being a Malfoy, it only causes pain and bad faith. I cant even get a good girlfriend because all the girls from Slytherin go after my money and when they say the don't, they lie. Of course once I'm in Hogwarts, there's no turning back, I must keep my image and reputation alive. I must be the old arrogant, rude and violent Draco Malfoy.   
  
It almost killed me to see women suffer, it always reminded me of my dear mother who bears the pain every second. Even right now as I'm thinking these horrible thoughts I know that somewhere in the Malfoy Mansion, my mother is trying to get away from the monster. Oh how I wish I can be there to support her, to help her and hug her. But I guess that wont be, I guess I have to stay here and put up and image of being all happy with my money but on the inside I will always have the pain that runs through my veins like snakes who are trying to set free. So many nights I have sat in my lonely bedroom and cut myself with anything that was around. My most reliable source were my daggers. My father bought me quiet a selection, he thought that since it was my 16th birthday he should get me something big, something that will cause pain to muggle borns, and so he got me daggers with a little note on it saying…   
  
Please me well son-  
  
All those countless times when I have sat by my fire with a dagger in my hand, all those images that have ran through my head have been quickly erased by the incredible deep cuts that still heal to this day. For all those nights, I say and wondered if my life was any different, how would people react to me, how people would talk to me. Those nights have made me realize that I am nothing but a lost soul wandering around the empty streets that have no light, no sun, and no air to breath.   
  
And now here I am sitting in front of a young girl who is crying, but why, she can't have problems could she? So I did what my mind wasn't prepared for, especially since I have no clue as to who this girl is. I slowly reached out my hand and wiped it away. She seemed to be lost somewhere because of the way she responded. She slowly turned her head towards mine and there we locked eyes. My lonely worthless silver eyes met her deep lost chocolate eyes. Only then it hit me that I've seen these eyes somewhere before, it was Hermione Granger.   
  
"What are you playing at Malfoy?" she said in a harsh voice.   
  
"Grager?" I asked in an unbelieving tone.  
  
"Who did you think I was?" she said somewhat calmly.   
  
"What happened to you?" I asked ignoring her question.   
  
Hermione's POV  
  
"What are you talking about?" I asked. I hope he isn't talking about me crying at his presence.   
  
"Well it's just that I don't see any Weasels or Potty with you, must be bad timing I guess. Oh and what's with the sudden change in cloths?" He asked looking up and down my body.   
  
"Not that it's any of your business, ferret, but there is no change, I've always been this way. I see you're still the same old arrogant git as usual with your remarks and your clothes." I said looking at his face then down to his black shirt which I must admit, suited him nicely. His black belt that was holding the black jeans he was wearing was all loose but not too loose. I continued to examine what he was wearing until his voice interrupted all the thoughts in my head.  
  
Draco's POV  
  
"Like what you see mudb --, muggle?" Whats the matter with me, I cant even call her a mudblood anymore. 'Maybe because you don't care about that stuff anymore' said the second voice in his head.   
  
"Don't flatter yourself ferret face" she said nonchalantly.   
  
"Oh, I must say I'm hurt by the name calling, it has put me into quiet the depression era" I said sarcastically.   
  
"Well it would be nice if you actually visited that era once in a while, because then for once you wouldn't be making fun of others" she said in an normal voice.   
  
"What do you know Granger? You have no idea what depression is, so if I were you I'd shut my mouth?"   
  
"Oh and you do? What the Slytherin Prince has some family troubles back at home? Not getting enough money in your allowance?" She said looking right at me.   
  
This hit me like a brick in the face, I couldn't take anymore of her smart mouthed comments about me like that. I suddenly stood up and put my hands on both sides of her. She seemed shocked by my actions but soon her face was normal again and all I saw was fear and sadness hidden in her deep dark eyes.   
  
"You know nothing mudblood, one day I wont be in my best mood and I just might make a little visit to your bed and cut your throat when you are asleep" I hissed. I looked at her and saw her relax under me. She saw through me, she knew I wasn't going to cut her but she was still scared. I never noticed how beautiful she really was. She didn't have any make-up on and she wasn't in her best clothes and yet she still managed to look just…angelic, even though she was wearing black. There was something in her eyes that got me thinking, she's hiding something, something so deep only I would understand. She's hiding something that no one can know. I saw pain and suffering right in front of my eyes.   
  
"Wouldn't that just be lovely?" she muttered so quietly that I barely heard her. I was right, she is hiding something. I slowly released this cage I set around her with my hands.   
  
"What?" I said quietly.   
  
"Nothing Malfoy, nothing" she answered a minute later. I sat back down in my seat, which took her by surprise and I just sat there watching her. Trying to understand her. Trying to explain to myself that maybe there is someone out there who shares my emotions, but nothing came through.   
  
"Are you done staring Malfoy, I've had enough of your jokes. What you think you can come in here take one look, figure me out and run to your little Slytherins, telling them how you saw me cry in front of you and how scared I was when you threatened me? Am I right, well c'mon I'm sure there waiting for you." She said this so fast that it took me a few minutes to understand what she was saying.   
  
"What" I replied quietly. I can't believe she thinks of me that way, then again, why wouldn't she think of me this way. I am the cold hearted Malfoy who made fun of her all throughout our years at Hogwarts.   
  
"I'm not going to do that" I said looking away from her. I couldn't look at her, her sadistic image just told me how I wanted to talk to her, find out more about her and understand the true Hermione Granger.   
  
"But if you don't me in here, I understand" I said and at the same time getting up from where I was sitting and picking up my bag.   
  
"No er… I never said you weren't welcome here, I just thought that…"  
  
"Well you thought wrong" I screamed   
  
"I'm not like them. I don't… I don't go off killing innocent muggles or playing some silly jokes on people. I've had my share of jokes already" I said in a some what normal voice.   
  
"People just don't see it, but I … I want someone… anyone to at least see me, I'm not asking for much, just to open their eyes and see that I'm not the bad guy in school and I'm not that cruel Slytherin anymore" I said more to myself rather than her. I dropped my book bag and slowly sat down across from her avoiding her gaze. I stared out the window and finally noticed something so wonderful in it, like something is guiding me out there. I just sat there for a few seconds and just started to visualize my mother and I having a great time, sitting in my backyard with her pushing me on the swings, laughing so hard that I thought I was going to be sick.   
  
Hermione's POV  
  
I had no idea he was troubled or the fact that he actually changed. I sat there across from him just getting a good look at his well shaped face with his silver blond hair falling in his eyes, oh those beautiful eyes. You can see sorrow and seclusion in those blue-silvery eyes. I never knew that the most arrogant pig that goes by the name Draco Malfoy could be this way. He was alone in his pool of misery with no one to talk with and no one to play jokes on. I actually felt sorry for him, knowing very well of our history this was rather silly of me to even think. I just couldn't help but feel slightly happy about the fact that I'm not the only one who suffers from sorrow and grief. I slowly got up and sat by him. This caught him by surprise and so he slowly turned his head to face mine and there were those sadistic eyes that have been on my mind all throughout the ride.   
  
"Malf…Draco I know what It's like" I said very quietly.   
  
Draco's POV  
  
She said my name, but why, she doesn't pity me does. Last thing I need it pity from her. But it sounded so beautiful coming out of her mouth.   
  
"You don't Granger, you just don't." I said harshly but not moving from where I sat. She was sitting so close to me that I can practically hear her breathing. I felt her body heat travel over to my body. Why am I being this cruel to her? She's only trying to help.   
  
"I mean…you will never understand what goes on in my life so I suggest you forget about this whole thing, ok Hermione?" I said using her first name. To me it was the most beautiful name in the world and this name shouldn't just go to no one it should suit the person its being given to and Hermione was definitely that person. I mean look at me, here she is trying to comfort me when all I do is avoid her and block her from me. What's wrong with me?   
  
Hermione's POV  
  
This is what I get form trying to help another person, well I guess some things never change. But the way he said my name, it was so soft and it came so natural to him like he had been saying it all along when really he thinks I'm just a worthless filthy little mudblood. That's all I will ever be to him. As I looked outside I saw that we were getting close to Hogwarts and I still needed to go and talk with Professor McGonagall about my Head Girl business. I started to look for my back and realized that It was on the other side of Draco. So I got up and walked around him and started to gather my bag. I did this all in such a hurry that I didn't even realize I dropped a book. I ran out of the compartment and started to search for McGonagall.   
  
Draco's POV  
  
Why is she leaving? Why do I care? I don't care where that filthy little mudblood goes. 'But she's not filthy and you know it, you're just trying to cover up the fact that you enjoyed her company' said my idiotic second voice. As she was rushing so fast she didn't even notice that she dropped her book. As I reached for it I was about to call for her but she already left and suddenly I feel even worse. I feel so lonely and miserable. When she was here I felt so good and I didn't even realize that the reason why I felt good was because she was there. I guess you never know when you have something so good until it's finally gone. I examined the book and it seemed to be a normal book that was black with golden letters on them. I realized it was in another language since I couldn't understand the letters. I opened the book and it was filled with writings. The handwriting is all too familiar. The pages were yellow like this book has been passed on for ages. The pages were slightly stained with round circles and then it hit me, its tears. She must have been writing all of this when she felt bad. I knew it was wrong of me to look at them but I just couldn't defy it, I had to know what was in it. I skimmed through the pages and opened a random page and read it… 


	3. Head Boy and Head Girl

Waterfall-  
  
I want to witness the sun being set.   
  
I want to witness the flowers bloom.   
  
I want to see my reflection in the pure water of a streaming waterfall.   
  
This waterfall is far from reach and yet as i pull out my hand i feel the water being sprayed down on me.   
  
This waterfall is beautiful in a way that it speaks its own language.   
  
I open my eyes and realize that it is not a waterfall i am witnessing.   
  
It is the reflection of myself standing in front of the mirror.   
  
I have closed my eyes to shut the world from me to try and hope that all i see are flowers and sunsets.  
  
I have only now realized that those wonderful sprays of water were my own sprays of tears.   
  
Tears that have been fighting to get out.   
  
Tears that only someone so powerful could have caused them.   
  
But why are they there?  
  
Im fine, am I?  
  
Or maybe not.   
  
Maybe all i need right now is a prayer.  
  
All i need is to know that tommorow i'll be safer.   
  
Why was she crying? This makes me remember the time when I came in here and found her with tears in her eyes. I still haven't asked her about that. I doubt she'll answer me. 'Why do you even care' said the second voice. Ugh I hate myself for getting involved. But why though, of all people, why would she have problems. What's her reason?  
  
As I kept skimming through the pages I came across a very frightening one which only caused me to remember that I have been there.   
  
Flow-  
  
Should i take this pill right this moment?  
  
Should i call someone just in case?  
  
Should i risk my life and let it flow?  
  
Should they save me from this pain?  
  
Will they save me just in time?  
  
Will they stop or keep on trying?  
  
Should i risk my life and let it flow?  
  
What if they wont come in time?  
  
What if they just wont try?  
  
Will it be too late or will i die?  
  
Should i risk my life and let it flow?  
  
These are the questions that i want   
  
Ahh the same question's being asked. The same feeling of sorrow, hurt, and torture. God I feel like I have taken out my book and read one of my own poems. But what's hurting her the most. Isn't she the famous Hermione Granger, friend of Harry Potter, know-it-all mudblood Granger. What's causing her this pain? I want to know. And one thing for sure about Malfoys is that we get what we want. Therefore I'm going to find out why this mudblood makes me think this way of her, why she's on my mind, and why in Merlin's name am I constantly thinking about her and only her.   
  
I was pulled out of my thoughts by the train slowly stopping and students of Hogwarts suddenly rushing through the corridors. I gather all my things and examine the compartment, making sure I have everything. I take her book and put it in my bag. As I was exiting the compartment and walking towards the carriages that would lead us to Hogwarts I felt like I was being watched. I turn around and suddenly a dark shadow sweeps past me and carries on towards the carriages. I follow this mysterious person not knowing why. When she went by me I smelled its fragrance and it was a tinge of vanilla which is exactly how Granger smelled. Ohh how I remember that smell…  
  
I watched this woman slowly enter the carriage, she was dressed in Hogwarts uniform. She wore a black hooded cloak, I couldn't tell which house she belongs to because she hid her patch.  
  
Narrator's POV  
  
As she sat down she slowly raised her hand to touch her cheek and wiped her tears away so no one would notice. She didn't even want her friends to recognize her. She knew that they never really had a strong relationship, for all she was used was knowledge and books that she spent hours and hours translating just because she knew it was the right thing to do. She didn't think for herself and she was constantly looking for answers, answers that were yet so close but seemed distant as well. She sure did change from that lost person. Although her friends cared about her, they just didn't know how to say the right thing at the right time.   
  
She never felt like she was cared for, after her mother's death she realized that there were just no one else out there who deeply cared for her as much as her mother. She felt more tears rolling down her cheek and mentally stopped herself because she didn't want anyone to think that something was wrong with the ever happy Hermione Granger. As she was walking towards the carriages she noticed a young tall man walking slowly in front of her. She immediately knew who it was when she saw the beautiful platinum blond hair blowing from side to side.  
  
She watched him and studied every action he made, that was until he stopped in his track, almost sensing her presence and turned around. She put on her matching black hood so he wouldn't see her. Just as he turned around she suddenly walked faster and went past him almost touching his arm that lay parallel to his well toned body. She was glad that she didn't have to wait for any carriages so she took the one that was already filled with student just so he wouldn't sit next to her or start to talk to her. She sat down and felt his eyes burning in the back of her head.  
  
She dared not to turn around.   
  
Both students arrived at Hogwarts and have entered the Great Hall.   
  
"Welcome , welcome young Hogwarts students. For all you must be hungry right now. But there are some wonderful news that I would like to pass on to you. We will be having a grand ball this year which will be very fascinating I hope." Loud roars and cheers were taken over the Great Hall. " Now for the final news, I must congratulate our Head Boy and Head Girl for their final year at Hogwarts. Our new Head Girl is Hermione Granger." Loud cheering were heard from everyone but the Slytherins. " And our new Head Boy is Draco Malfoy" cheering were revolving around the Slytherin table except of course the Gryffindors. "Would the heads be so kind enough to join me after dinner?" Dumbledore said looking at the two of us through his spectacles.  
  
"Oh no, how could that be?" Hermione said out loud.   
  
"Don't worry Mione, If he becomes a bother to you, you always know your way to the Gryffindor tower" said the famous Harry Potter.   
  
"Yeh Mione, If he does one thing wrong, he'll never see it coming, that ferret" said Ronald Weasley.  
  
Hermione gave them a half hearted smile and told them she would take care of herself.   
  
"And plus Ron, you have to watch out for you little sister, looks like she's getting hit on by almost every singe guy in here" She said smiling towards Ginny, who returned that warm smile of hers.   
  
Hermiome's POV  
  
"Oh no, I have to wait for him now. Oh well, I'll just wait by the stairs" she said to herself. As I was leaving I noticed someone watching me so I immediately looked at the Slytherin table trying to find those icy blue eyes who have been on my mind since the train ride. To my surprise I couldn't find him so I decided I must be going a little crazy. "well can you honestly blame me?" I asked myself. As I opened the door that lead me out of the Great Hall I bumped into something hard and for a minute I thought to myself "why would anyone put up a statue right in front of the Great Hall?"   
  
"sorry" I said without looking up. I continued to walk when I felt being watching again and slowly turned my head around to see those same blue eyes who I just searched for.   
  
"I need to talk to you" he said without any emotion on his face. I suddenly thought that this must be one of his pranks or jokes so I quickly put on my disgusted face and replied harshly.   
  
" I don't think you do, Malfoy" I started to turn around when he came closer to me and turn my by my right hand. The hand that was burning with red venom just days ago.   
  
"ahhh…No…just don't …please let…let me go" I cried.   
  
Draco's POV  
  
I grabbed her by her wrist just to get her attention and attention I got. She screamed in pain as if I was stabbing a knife in her hand.  
  
"What's the matter mudblood, not so tough now are you?" I said through gritted teeth. She's hurting, and I'm the reason that she's hurting. I suddenly remembered when my dad was hitting my mother and she was trying to get away so he grabbed her by her small wrists and pinned her against the wall just to throw a better punch at her. I suddenly released her hand and looked away. I didn't want to see her, no, I would feel even more inferior. I couldn't see her hurt and yet I still did it. I met her gaze and we locked eyes with each other. I saw fright hidden deep in her chocolate eyes and besides fear there was tenderness and sorrowfulness along with many other things. But the one that stood out was fright and that wasn't there before. I scarred her and now she'll never understand me in a way that I want her to understand me. I looked at her hand which started to bleed a little and I thought to myself quickly "I couldn't have done that just by grabbing her".   
  
I ran to her and started looking at it, that was until she grabbed it away and ran off the other way. I stood there and watched her small figure running down the hall, not bothering to go after her, knowing that if I do she will only get more scared. The last thing on my mind was that terrifying deep cut in her wrist that were continuously followed by a serious of many little cuts.   
  
She cuts herself, and I'm willing to find out the cause of her doing so. 


	4. Solitude and Anguish

As the girl ran through the empty corridors of Hogwarts she realized she cannot hide anymore. A simple talk led to something so revealing. How will she hide it from everyone else. "He knows, he must know" she said to herself. Trying hard not to believe it but overall failing miserably. She was running so fast that she didn't even notice where she was going, that Is of course when she bumped into something, rather someone. She looked up and was gladly met by Albus Dumbledor.  
  
"Sorry Prof-…" she was losing to much blood which caused her to faint. She was caught by Dumbledor himself. He quickly took her to the hospital. Madam Pomfrey took her to the nearside bed and laid her down on it. "There, there, my sweet Hermione. Nothing to worry now, I'll take care of you" She started asking questions and examining her.  
  
Albus had left knowing all to well what exactly was going on here.  
  
Madam Pomfrey looked at Hermione's paleness on her face which took over rapidly. She looked at her bloody hand and examined it closely. "A deep cut, followed by many others" thought the witch. "My, my, our dead Hermione is in trouble" just as she was thinking this Hermione finally awoke.  
  
"Wha…Where am I ?" said the flushed Hermione.  
  
"Hermione, dear, please tell me if something is troubling you. You know I'm always here to help" said the witch calmly.  
  
Panic arose in Hermione's body. Shivering she stood up from the bed and said  
  
"You have nothing to worry about Madam Pomfrey, I can take care of myself. I am after all the know-it-all Granger, am I not?"  
  
"It's not that dear, I just thou-…" she was cut of my Hermione's screaming.  
  
"NO! you're wrong, you cant do anything now, cant you, so just let it go. There isn't ANYONE can do" she looked down, not wanting to look at the kind witch.  
  
"I'm sorry Madam, but this Is just something that I have to deal with myself" and with that she ran out of the Hospital Wing.  
  
She noticed there was something in her cloak's pocket so she took it out and examined it. It was a piece of parchment with writing on it. It was Dumbledors handwriting. She knew it. This odd looking piece of parchment had the directions to her house. She followed it and within seconds she came face to face with some old portrait which would lead her to her Head Quarters. She said the password and entered the common room.   
  
I entered the Head Boy and Head Girl common room and mentally complimented Dumbledor for choosing such an exquisite room filled with so many great portraits that seem to be watching your every move. It had a huge couch which was settled in the middle of the common room itself. I walked down the steps to get a better view of this wide and luxurious room. Then my eyes landed on a wooden door with my initials on it. I walked towards the room and said the password.   
  
"Black Rose" said an unsure Hermione. The wooden door opened and she entered her room. It was decorated in Red and Gold, "True Griffyndor, huh" she said to herself. She walked a little further and found her bed right in the middle of the room. It was all red with golden blankets surrounding it. She looked up and saw the night sky. "Dumbledor must have bewitched it" she said silently.   
  
She walked over to her dresser and found that all of her belongings have been put to place. She wandered off into the bathroom and found it very intriguing. It was black and white with sparkling ceiling to top it off. She saw that the bath could easily fit about 5 people in it. Opposite to the bath, she found the sink filled with all of her belongings. She looked through them, just to make sure. Right next to her sink was another identical sink which had a slightly different color to it. She quickly looked through the things that were put on it and noticed things such as hair gel, and after shave. Suddenly she thought to herself that she must be sharing the bathroom with Malfoy.   
  
"Oh, that's just great" she said to herself. She picked up his after shave and examined it.   
  
"hmm...I wonder how it smells like" she put the bottle close to her face and inhaled the beautiful scent she smelled when she walked past him right before entering the Great Hall.   
  
"Would you kindly remove your face from my bottle" said the cruel voice of none other than Malfoy.   
  
When she heard him, she immediately put the bottle down and looked in his eyes.   
  
"Sorry... I ...I just thought it was one of my..."stuttered Hermione.   
  
"Wow, I didn't know you shaved your face, Granger, well looks like we learn something new everyday, do we now" smirked Malfoy.   
  
"Oh sod of Malfoy, haven't you got better things to do than to waste your time on a filthy mudblood?" asked Hermione with confidence.   
  
"Tsk, tsk, tsk, that attitude will get you know where, my dear mudblood as you put it"  
  
said Malfoy all along keeping his smirk on his face. He knew this was all getting under her skin and all he wanted to do was to get on her nerves at the time.   
  
"You're right. You know what, I think I should just listen to you and obey your rules that way I can actually get somewhere, as you put it" said Hermione.   
  
This caught Malfoy off guard, he had no idea that Granger would actually talk to him that way. Everyone feared him, even his own friends. He observed her face and found nothing that could explain this. His smirk faded and he loosen a bit.   
  
"What...not used to people actually talking to you" said Hermione. She found herself forming a smile at the corners of her lips. In a slow movement she went around him and found herself in her room. She closed the door and secured it just so he wont try any tricks on herself at night.   
  
She went to her trunk and started taking out her personal things. She came across this picture of her mother and herself playing in the backyard, chasing butterflies. She looked closely at herself and noticed exactly how much she has changed. That smile, that beautiful wide smile has been tainted with cruelty and violence. She no longer remembered exactly how to smile the proper way. The way she used to when her mother was alive. She put her index finger on her mother's faces. Tracing her mothers figure she studied every part of her body. She saw the happiness and sunshine that was circling them. She felt a tear slip down her cheek and quickly wiped it away. She dismissed the thought of knowing that Draco Malfoy was in the next room.  
  
Hermione stood up and went over to her bed. She sat in the middle of this huge bed and put the picture close to her heart and started to cry silently. Silence was all there was that night. About 10 minutes later she found herself suddenly awake so she went over to the trunk and put the picture far, far away. She noticed she had some piece of parchment and quill in her trunk so she immediately took that out and went over to the desk that stood near the window. She started to write some things down and just looking out the window. Her thoughts instantly went back to her mother's fragile white face. As she was writing she didn't even notice the tears rolling down her cheeks. She decided now would be a good time to just go to sleep so she went over to her trunk and took out a bottle with liquid inside of it. Went over to the bathroom and poured the right amount of liquid in the cup and drank it.  
  
Hermione went to her bed and was welcomed by a nice shutdown of everything. Her mother, her scars, her misery, her torture, her one and only father who was the reason of it all.   
  
Draco was astounded by the braveness of the little Gryffindor. He would never in a million years think that the might know-it-all Granger would actually say something like that to him. "Well I guess you do learn something new everyday" he said to himself.   
  
Draco went in his room and found himself enjoying the sight of it. He had a somewhat similar bedroom at the Malfoy Manor but it wasn't as this big and definitely not as luxurious. He went over to the balcony which he noticed was connected to Hermione's balcony. He stepped out and looked beyond the stars and the sky. He looked far into it that he had images of his mother laying on the floor with his dad towering over her.   
  
"Ughhh....why...why can't I just get one day? ONE day of solitude!" he screamed at no one in particular. He opened his eyes and was welcomed by the night's cold breeze kissing his delicate skin as it passed by. He slowly went back to his bedroom and the image of his mother had never left his mind. He went over to his dresser and took out his dagger. His one of a kind dagger that he had since he was 13 years old. He remembered all to well how that day went when he first received it.   
  
*flashback*  
  
"Draco" his mother beautiful voice rang through his ears. "Draco, honey, would you come down here?" she screamed lightly again.   
  
"Coming mother." Answered the little boy.   
  
"Ah...there you are. All grown up, now aren't we?" said Narcissa in a light voice.   
  
"Well I have a present for you my son. Come here" she patted the seat next to her.   
  
The little boy ran over as soon as he could and in just no time he was astonished by something sparkling in back of his mother's hand. It was covered in a velvet cloth and it seemed to be a long stick.   
  
"Aww...no mother, I already have my wand. I just bought it yesterday" said the little boy.   
  
His mother smiled her innocent smile and revealed this strange looking stick. She carefully slid the cloth off of it and waited for his response.   
  
"Oh amazing, it's a ...um..." he was having difficulties remembering but he did see it in an ancient book somewhere.   
  
"Draco, this is something very important to me and it will become something very important to you as well. I want you to promise me, you'll treasure it" she looked in his eyes. "This can lead to bad things and also it can lead to good things. There is a spell charmed on this dagger, it's a spell that will protect it until it will finally be set with the other pair."   
  
"Oh awesome, you bought me two of these" said the happy little boy.   
  
" No my dear, the other pair is hidden well from the Malfoys. If you get that second pair, Draco, then you can end violence, do you understand me?"   
  
"The reason I'm giving this to you is because I don't want your father to find out. Promise me Draco, you will NEVER show him this to him. PROMISE me!" said his mother.   
  
"I..I promise mother." Said the terrifying boy.   
  
"But mother...what exactly does it give me" asked the boy.   
  
"It has great power that only you can find out for yourself, Draco. Only you can find out" said his mother, looking away from his gaze.   
  
They were interrupted by a loud crash in the living room and Narcissa knew that he came home.   
  
"Quickly son, go and hide it! RUN" screamed the mother. The boy ran as fast as he could to his bedroom, praying to god that his father wouldn't catch him. He entered his room and went over to his bed and hid the dagger deep under his mattress.   
  
*end flashback*  
  
Draco looked down at this exquisite looking object and remembered just how his mother got yelled at when his father had finally found out. But no matter what Draco never told him where he hid it. He kept switching the hidden places every day and never got caught. He was starting to believe that there really was some kind of charm on it.   
  
Remembering how his mothers screams echoed in his head and how his fathers roars have frightened her. The look that she had whenever he was around was terrifying enough to collapse right there. He hated watching this, he hated having these visions on his mind. He hated his father for being so cruel and violent towards his mother. So many times did he try do to something and what was the outcome. More revenge.   
  
He took this shinning dagger and quickly thought of an escape from his world of woes.  
  
He directed his dagger at his wrist and slowly started to push harder into his skin. He looked at it as the red liquid flowed downward towards his elbow. The boy dropped his hand and watched as it stained the floor. He slid down against the wall and just observed this red fluid when all of the sudden he realized he was in the state of darkness.   
  
Ah...this breathtaking darkness where your problems aren't visible, where your fears are hidden, where there is no one but ...you.   
  
In a world of solitude, I have been released. In a world of anguish I have been born. 


	5. Hermione's parchment

LOOKING FOR AN EDITOR OR A BETA READER (if that's what it's called)  
  
Hermione tossed and turned all throughout her sleep. She had that nightmare that haunted her every second of the day. She finally woke up in the middle of the night and realized what time it was. She told herself to go to sleep but just couldn't force herself to go through that haunting experience again. She slowly got up from the bed and made her way to the balcony. Hermione opened the door and allowed this incredibly welcoming breeze caress her soft skin. She made her way to the end of the balcony and just stood there admiring the sky and the emptiness. She looked on her left and realized that she can see someone's bed and she suddenly remembered that she's sharing a common room with Malfoy, which means that that room is his and that must be his bed. As she was watching him she noticed that he tossed and turned in his sleep. Wondering why he's having trouble sleeping she decided to come and take a better closer look. She watches him closely, studying his face features and admiring his look without the hair gel and without that famous smirk he has.  
  
She began to shiver and decided she should go back inside. Hermione stepped inside and closed the balcony door without noticing that she forgot to lock the door. She went to her bed and quickly fell asleep with a certain Slytherin's face on her mind.  
  
Draco woke up at exactly 6 o'clock and decided to take a nice shower before going off to breakfast. He gathered his clothes and walked to the bathroom. Draco stepped into the shower and let the hot pouring water hit his face, hence causing him to completely wake up. He got out of the shower and decided to do his hair. Applied some hair gel into his platinum white hair and brushed his teeth. Once he was satisfied with the way he looked he opened the door only to find Hermione standing there with her arms crossed against her chest, and tapping her foot against the floor. She was wearing a tee-shirt along with some pants. She also wore this serious face.  
  
"Well, are you just going to stand there and stare or would you rather move so I can have access to OUR bathroom which you were in for about AN HOUR!" screamed the grouchy Hermione.  
  
"Never knew you weren't a morning person, Granger, oh and you should wear that more often" Malfoy said pointing with his finger to what Hermione was wearing and still not moving.  
  
"What are you still doing standing there, Malfoy?" said Hermione in a some what normal voice.  
  
"Just thinking how long do I have to stay here until I actually get to see some action happen" smirked Malfoy.  
  
"Ugh, you're disgusting." Hermione said pushing him out of her way and slamming the door behind her.  
  
Hermione drew herself a bath and applied some vanilla scent in it. She spent about 20 minutes in the bath until she realized she should get ready for breakfast. Hermione slowly took her time getting out of the bath and drying herself. She came out of the bathroom and entered her room. Took her skirt, blouse, tie, a pair of socks and put on her robe. She came out of her room and started walking down to breakfast. She really wasn't hungry but there was no where else she can go to other than the library. So she finally decided that she might as well go to the library and read some interesting books.  
  
She opened the door and was met by the librarian who asked her why she wasn't at breakfast and Hermione replied politely saying that she just wasn't hungry. She went to the back of the room and picked out her favorite book. She sat in a wide comfortable chair and started to read.  
  
Thirty minutes went by and it was already time for her first class which she dreaded the most. Potions.  
  
She realized she was already 10 minutes late so she started running to Professor Snape's class. Hermione opened the door rather violently making quiet a disturbance.  
  
"Sorry Professor I was ju-..." she started to explain herself when Professor Snape cut her off.  
  
"Tsk, tsk, tsk, Head Girl being 15 minutes late to her class. Unacceptable Ms.Granger! 30 points from Gryffindor" bellowed Professor Snape.  
  
Hermione looked around and found no seats available where the Gryffindor's sat and the only one that was unoccupied was by none other than Draco Malfoy. She looked at Harry and Ron and saw them mouth "sorry" to her and give her guilty face.  
  
She sat by Malfoy telling herself that she wont get into a fight with him, especially not under Professor Snape's watch. She quickly looked at him and saw that he was sitting in a half laying half sitting position with his pen in his mouth and that famous smirk on his face was glued to his face. He was looking straight at her when she looked at him and smirked even more, if that was possible.  
  
"Ms. Granger would you please stop giving Mr.Malfoy a hard time concentrating" said Professor Snape. She couldn't believe it. Did he not see the way Malfoy was looking at her?  
  
As Professor Snape was talking about his upcoming potion Malfoy sat straight and took out a piece of parthment and started to write something down. Hermione tried to look at what he was saying. She didn't understand what it was because Snape wasn't instructing them to write anything down and even if he did, she highly doubted that Malfoy would write even then.  
  
She looked at him and he had a serious face on and once again she remembered how he looked that night. To her he almost looked...angelic. With his blond hair and his fair skin he almost did look like an angel but that was all erased when she remembered exactly who he was. She started concentrating on the lesson rather than some Slytherin.  
  
Draco saw how Hermione reacted when she saw him sitting there with his smirk on his face and he just couldn't get enough of it. "She looks nice when she's mad" he found himself thinking this.  
  
He then started thinking about different things and completely not paying much attention to Snape. He remembered that how he just recently got his letter from breakfast saying that he should come home for the next weekend. He knew exactly what that meant. His father would give him the death mark because obviously he was "all grown up". But Draco didn't want to get that mark. Secretly he wished for Voldemort to lose his power and all the Death Eaters sent to Azkaban. He should come up with a plan to avoid this meeting. But he wont be able to do it constantly so decided that for right now, this should buy him some time.  
  
He quickly sat up and started to write a letter to his father. Once he was finished he folded this parchment and mentally told himself to go to the Owelry after classes ened. Just in time the bell rang and student rushed out of class. He noticed that Hermione left some parchment on the table while hurrying through others to get to her next class.  
  
Draco picked it up and was astonished by what he just read. What is wrong with her? He thought with a troubled face.  
  
Most importantly... Who is doing this...?  
  
Sorry its short but the next one will be long because you'll find out more of Hermione.  
  
~marina 


	6. You'll pay!

Hermione rushes out of Potions classroom trying to forget what she just wrote on that piece of parchment. She didn't even want to write it, it just came out like she just realized she remembered something and quickly rushed to write it down. She was having those words repeated in her head, over and over again. They never seemed to leave. She found her legs carrying her to an unknown corridor and she suddenly realized she was alone. So she slowed down her pace and went to lean against the wall for support. She slowly slid down the wall letting all her emotions run free and let her tears roll down like they always do. This was already natural for her. To her this seemed like another usual day, the difference was that she was in school and in some mysterious corridor.  
  
Then she heard footsteps, she tried to tell herself to get up and walk away but her feet were glued to the cold floor. She put her head down thinking that whoever it is will see her and just run away or get on with their business. But to her surprise it was nothing like that.  
  
"Granger?" she heard the voice of Draco Malfoy. 'No I will not let him see me cry, again, what is wrong with you Hermione?' she asked herself.  
  
She quickly wiped away all of her tears but knew that even the most dense person there is would still figure out that she was crying. She felt him come closer to her and it was a matter of seconds before she felt him slide down the same wall and sit right by her.  
  
"Why are you here?" said Hermione in barely a whisper. "You left something in Potions." He said holding out a piece of parchment. Hermione's eyes went wide open and she quickly tore it out of his hands. She scanned it with her eyes and knew exactly what it was.  
  
All there is is pain and sorrow. Can't he see my soul is already hollow? I try to move but he approaches with his deadly stare. I try to run all along knowing that my legs just won't bare. Even If I run and hide, he'll still take away my pride. He's come closer so I assumer he's near. As I lay still letting out a single tear.  
  
"Did you...did you read it?" she asked him in an unsure voice without meeting his gaze.  
  
Draco couldn't lie to her especially when he truly understood what she's going through and all along he cannot tell her anything because he knows better than that. Malfoy's never shared their problems.  
  
"Yes" he whispered lightly.  
  
Hermione smiled lightly. "Great, another thing you can make fun of me. Well it was great talking to you Mr.Malfoy but I have classes to get to." Said Hermione in a hurtful voice.  
  
She was just about to stand when Draco pulled on her hand which caused her to fall down and to resume her sitting position.  
  
"I'm not going to make fun of you Granger" said Malfoy.  
  
"Well, I must say, I am shocked but would you care to tell me why is it that you are suddenly all nice to me?" said Hermione with sarcasm spilling in.  
  
"Because...because I've been there all right." Draco felt that if he could tell her she's not the only one she would open up to him. 'But why would you want her to open up to you, I thought you said she's a filthy mudblood who isn't worth your time' said the inner voice.  
  
"Listen Malfoy, I don't know what you're trying to do here but I really do need to get to my classes." Said Hermione.  
  
"Really, care to tell me which is your next class, bet you don't even know that do you. And bet you I know exactly why you DON'T know that" said Malfoy looking straight into her eyes. Hermione tried to think hard which was her next period class but she just wouldn't remember.  
  
"All right so you win this time, but know that we share a common room together and I will not be stopped to do something to you if you try anything, ANYTHING at all." Said Hermione.  
  
She sat down by him and rested her head against the cold stoned wall.  
  
"Granger...why...why do you write all that stuff" said Malfoy also resting his head against the wall behind them.  
  
"I ...I tend to...wait...what do you mean 'all that stuff'?" Hermione asked. Then she remembered that she hasn't written or even seen her black book. She quickly scanned through her mind, trying to remember where was the last time she saw it or wrote in it.  
  
"The train" she whispered.  
  
"What?" asked Malfoy.  
  
"Where is my book?" Hermione raised her voice. She saw Malfoy's head slowly turn to face her.  
  
"What would you say if I tell you that I know where it is." Smirked Malfoy.  
  
"Ugh can you stop with the smirking and actually talk civilly towards me." Said Hermione, all along keeping her wrath held together.  
  
"Don't worry Granger, I have your book, you forgot it on the train and I was about to give it to you yesterday but you went to sleep a little early" said Malfoy with no expression on his pale face.  
  
'Well that was easy enough' thought Hermione.  
  
"So is it all true? I mean...what you write in your book?" questioned Malfoy looking in her deep chocolate eyes.  
  
"Why would you care anyway, Malfoy, It's not like we actually get along or just the fact that we hated each other all these years and now suddenly you want to become my friend and listen to my stories?" said Hermione.  
  
"Well it would be nice to actually have a friend I mean they don't treat you nice in Slytherin you know. They tend to get scared whenever I talk to anyone of them. " Malfoy said without looking at her.  
  
"What do you mean? I thought those people praised you, I mean you are their 'Slytherin God' are you not?" said Hermione.  
  
"Is that what they think?" smiled Malfoy.  
  
"Oh shut up, you're so full of yourself" Hermione playfully hit him in the arm.  
  
"Ah, I can't say I'm not hurt Hermione" said Malfoy with a childish pout on his face. Hermione froze and just looked at him, he didn't have his famous smirk on his face and he wasn't cold with her or calling her names, he was just Draco. A totally different person than Malfoy.  
  
"What? You know it's not nice to stare, Granger, especially when we're the one's here and there's no one else to stare at" said Malfoy keeping his smile.  
  
"You...you said my name" said Hermione in an unsure voice.  
  
"No I didn't, don't be foolish." Said Malfoy and quickly changing the subject.  
  
"Besides, we have a heads meeting in about 5 minutes, so we better go" said Malfoy, getting up and offering her his hand. She had this puzzled face and dared to ask him the next question.  
  
"Why are you being so nice to me?" Said Hermione.  
  
"What are you talking about?" answered Draco.  
  
Hermione suddenly had a change of emotions running through her mind and she understood it.  
  
She tore her hand away from his.  
  
"You pity me" she whispered so quietly only a person standing very close to her would hear.  
  
"I don't need your pity, Malfoy." Screamed Hermione and she ran off the other way.  
  
Malfoy stood there dumbfounded, not knowing what to do he just ran after her. She was headed in the wrong way and he was sure she didn't know herself where she was going.  
  
Hermione just kept on running and running until she reached a dark corner and thought to herself that she was safe, that was until she saw a dark figure coming close to her.  
  
"Well, well, well. If it isn't the trio's Mudblood." Drawled the voice of a cruel Slythein. She couldn't tell who it was because it was so dark but she knew that voice. She knew it very well.  
  
"Oh and look, standing right in front of the Slytherin Common room" said the voice. "Come back for more, my sweet Hermione?" then it hit her, it was Blaize Zambini.  
  
"No...Just leave me alone...please" she whispered.  
  
"Oh I don't think that will happen" said Blaize.  
  
Panic arose in Hermione's body, she started to shiver and suddenly images of the past flew by her like the wind.  
  
**Flashback**  
  
"No, No!" screamed Hermione as he approached her closer and closer. Ripping off her clothes he started to continue with his business. Looking back and checking to see if anyone else was in the room. It was clear, he looked back at her and saw tears and pain.  
  
"Don't hurt me" she whispered but was quickly blacked out by the force of his punch in her face.  
  
**End Flashback**  
  
"Get away from me!" she screamed loud enough for people to know that someone was in danger. She quickly took out her wand but he was quicker.  
  
"Accio Wand" he yelled and soon enough Hermione's wand was torn out of her hand.  
  
"No!" she screamed. "Not again"  
  
"Oh I think you wanted this to happen my sweet, why else would you come looking for me, am I right?" said Blaize.  
  
He started to come closer to her and she was forced to move back but there was no more room. He nailed her between the wall and his well toned masculine body. He reached out and touched her cheek and started to caress her lower lip with his thumb.  
  
Then he violently covered her mouth with his lips. Hermione started to cry silently, she tried to move herself but he was just to strong so she tried to move her arms which only caused him to grab her wrists and pin them above her head.  
  
"Not getting away now are we?" said Blaize. He let go of her hands only to rip off her shirt and start to go under her robes.  
  
"ZAMBINI" yelled the voice of Draco Malfoy. Blaize suddenly let go of her hands and turned around only to see an angry face of Malfoy.  
  
Draco quickly looked at who was the girl and found it to be none other than the girl he was just chasing.  
  
"Hermione" he questioned himself unsurely.  
  
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, YOU TWAT!" growled Draco. Coming closer to Blaize, Draco screamed again  
  
"You fool, get away from her NOW!" screamed Draco. Rushing to Hermione's side.  
  
"Its all right Draco, you can have her after I'm done" said the calm voice of Blaize.  
  
He was fixing his robes when all of the sudden he looked up only to see Draco's fist land straight in his face. Draco started throwing punches at him and in return he received a good punch in his left eye. He was beating him insanely until Blaize couldn't move and was on the floor.  
  
Hermione quietly stood there watching in amazement. 'Who would have ever thought that Draco Malfoy would come to rescue me, Hermione Granger'  
  
She ran to his side and took her wand back from Blaize. She looked at Malfoy who was standing there with torn up robes and a black eye.  
  
Hermione looked down at the floor. Draco rushed to her side and asked her.  
  
"Did he hurt you?" said Draco.  
  
She nodded a slow 'no' to him. She wanted to hug him for saving her but she just couldn't do it.  
  
"Twice" she whispered to know one in particular.  
  
Draco quickly looked her way.  
  
"What do you mean twice" said Draco. "He's done it twice" said Hermione in a whisper. She slowly stood up and started to walk away. Right before she turned the corner she looked back at the unconscious Blaize.  
  
"And this won't be the last time" she said barely in a whisper that even Draco himself might have not heard it.  
  
But he heard exactly what Hermione said. He looked back down at Blaize with an angry look on his face. He can see that even though Blaize was unconscious he could still breath and he could still function. Draco wanted none of this, from what he has just witnessed he wanted Zambini dead.  
  
"You'll pay, Zambini" said Draco with venom dripping from his voice. He took out his wand and muttered a spell under his breath followed by a roaring sound of  
  
"CRUCIO!" yelled Draco. 


	7. Black Rose

Hermione ran as fast as she could. She didn't really understand what really happened back there. Her mind was racing and she couldn't remember most of the things that occurred. She tried to think back and to concentrate but all she got from that was more pain in her head.  
  
"AHH!! Why do these things happen to me?" she screamed at herself. Next thing she knew, she was standing in front of her Head Room.  
  
"Black rose" she whispered quietly. The door opened and she walked to her room and collapsed on her bed. Then she was welcomed by a phase of darkness followed by the haunting dream she has now and then.  
  
~~ She was running and running, trying to get away from something, nay someone. Trying to be set free, she was tired of the exhausting life she has been living. Nothing is good enough for anyone, everyone expects better from her. She was forced to hide it all, to hide away the tears that threatened to come out any second now, forced to hide the bruises that only she, herself has caused them. But why, why would she ruin her body which these torturous bruises, these horrifying scars, only she would know the answer to that. Only she can honestly say that her life if nothing but a scar. A scar that wont go away, a scar so deeply cut that the more she knows its there, the more she knows she's in pain. Pain has become nothing more to her than a memory. A memory that will not fade away, this memory has come to stay and stay it shall.  
  
Not knowing where she is, she turns around and was greeted by a dark figure of a man. He was tall and built. With a sudden movement, he grabbed her body and started tearing off her clothes. She tried to scream but no words came out. She tried to get away but that only caused him to tighten his grip on her even tighter.  
  
With a sudden movement he raised his hand and slapped her so hard across her delicate face that she was blacked out and unconscious.  
  
Then in her blackness, she sees a white glow of sunlight. She tries to look but this brightness only causes her to fidget with her eyes. Out of no where she sees a well built man with a muscular body and platinum blond hair almost as if he were a unicorn.  
  
"Help" she whispers. But all he does is smile at her. He smiled that angelic smile of his and said one word.  
  
"Soon" the boy said. And with a quick flash he was gone.  
  
~~  
  
She gasps with sweat dripping from her forehead. She looks around her room and finds it in complete state of obscurity. She can't see a thing because of the dimness so she feels her way through to get to the bathroom. She walks in the bathroom, turns on a vanilla scented tap and lets the water fill up the deep bathtub. She tries to remember what the dream has been about but this time she couldn't remember anything bad that happened. She could only remember that smile and that was it. She smiled to herself and thought of who that angel could be and why did he save her from what she couldn't remember but she knew that she was in great danger and he came.  
  
With the water slightly spilling on the floor, she came back to reality and quickly shut the water tap off and let some water escape the bathtub. Quickly she stripped off her clothes and went inside the warm vanilla scented bathtub. 'How weird it is that I am taking a bath in the middle of the night?' she pondered to herself.  
  
Hermione looked at her hands and saw the bruises around her wrists, but what really caught her attention was her right hand and the deeply cut scar that was so easily visible. She traced it with her subtle fingers and remembered exactly what had happened that night. It was the night right before leaving to Hogwarts. She had an unpleasant encounter with her dad which had only caused her to do this to herself.  
  
"Why was I so stupid?" she asked herself quietly.  
  
She slowly shut her eyes from the fogginess that has set upon her delicate skin. And tried to remember that smile which had brought her slight happiness. Within minutes she dozed off in the bathtub.  
  
~~  
  
Serverus Snape was rushing down to the dungeons when he heard a horrifying scream of a male. He quickly changed routes and rushed right to the screaming sound. He came to a halt when he saw Draco Malfoy standing over a weak form of Blaise Zmbini.  
  
"DRACO! Have you no sense boy?" screamed the Professor.  
  
"FINITE INCANTEM" Shouted Snape.  
  
Draco stood there paralyzed, unable to move, unable to transfer any thought. Then out of nowhere Snapes voice has broken through him.  
  
"Well...answer me boy, what is the meaning of this?" bellowed Snape.  
  
"He deserved it" said Draco through gritted teeth. "No body deserved what he has done to a fellow ... female student" Draco had finished off saying. Not saying her name.  
  
"What has he done that would force you to use the 'Crucio' spell on him" said Snape in a somewhat calm voice.  
  
"Why don't you ask him" Draco said pointing to Blaise who had already stood up and started smirking at Draco.  
  
"Well...Zambini, Come on, I don't have all day." Said Snape.  
  
"I did what I should have finished doing back in Summer." Zambini said quietly that only Malfoy heard.  
  
"You son of a--..." Draco came rushing at Blaise.  
  
"That's enough! Both of you, Dumbledore's office. NOW!" screamed Snape.  
  
~~  
  
'Oh dear, it has happened again I see' said the man with a long white beard. 'He never learns. Just like his father'  
  
The doors to his office have opened and in came through Snape followed by Malfoy and Zambini.  
  
"Professor, these two stu—" said Snape.  
  
"That would be all Professor Snape, I can take it from here" said Dumbledore looking at the boys through his spectacles.  
  
Snape looked at Dumbledore with an amused expression and understood what he meant. He quickly left the office with his robes following him through the air.  
  
"Like father like son I see. Is that right Mr...Zambini?" said Dumbledore.  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about" said Zambini through gritted teeth. He really despised the Headmaster, for all he knew the Headmaster only favored muggle-borns and forgave anyone who did something wrong.  
  
"You will not lie in my office" screamed Dumbledore. Which only frightened both students. Never have they seen the Headmaster screaming at anything human or even inhuman, if that is possible.  
  
"Yeh...Yes Sir" said Blaise in an unsure voice.  
  
"What did you think was going to happen this time Zambini?"said Dumbledore.  
  
"Did you not think that someone wouldn't catch you...Fool" whispered Dumbledore who then started looking out the window, watching the darkness of the night fall so easily upon the Forbidden Forest.  
  
"You are to be transferred out of this school, with what you have done and to WHOM you have done it to, I should have let Draco finish his job right then and there." He stopped for a moment and closed his eyes. He quickly opened them and looked back at the scared face of Blaise Zambini.  
  
"You will find Durmstrang very foreign at first but we all get used to the things we don't appreciate, do we now" said Dumbledore in his calm voice, looking through his tiny spectacles at the student.  
  
"But, Professor, they wont like me—"said Zambini only to be interrupted by Dumbledore himself.  
  
"Silence, I won't have any of this. They shall pack up your things as soon as possible. You will not be a bother to young Ms. Granger anymore." Said Dumbledore.  
  
Blaise's eyes grew wide at the mention of Grangers name. 'He really does know' he thought to himself.  
  
"You are dismissed, uh Mr.Malfoy, may I have a word" said Dumbledore facing the window again.  
  
"Certainly"said Malfoy. He never really did respect the Headmaster, but after what he had just done, he knew that all what he didn't like about Dumbledore have quickly vanished. The old man really knew what he was doing around here.  
  
"I have something very important to discuss with you" said Dumbledore.  
  
Malfoy lowered his head in shame because he knew exactly what was coming. He would either call his house and tell his father which wouldn't go to well because he did protect a 'mudblood' and his relationship with his father wasn't to bright at this moment. The last time they had a nice chat was when he was 5 years old and Lucious wasn't a death eater. He was just considered Draco's father. After that he became cruel and violent to both Draco and his mother.  
  
"Yes sir, I understand completely" said Draco.  
  
"Oh good, then I wont have to tell you all about our side and the conditions you will have to work at" Said Dumbledore, smiling.  
  
"I completely unde—wait, what?" said an unsure Draco.  
  
"You didn't think I was to punish my second best student of Hogwarts who is in fact a Head Boy for trying to protect his fellow student from a death eater, did you? And you didn't think that I was to send away the person who will do a great job working for me?" said Dumbledore.  
  
That was all to much information at once. Did he say that Zambini was in fact a death eater and did he say work for him? Draco thought to himself all to quickly. But how can he be so sure about me. Aren't I the most feared person in school because of the name I carry.  
  
"Work for you, you mean, you know I'm not a death eater, like my father?" Said Draco.  
  
"Ahh my boy, I know too many things to remember, but that information I can put to use."  
  
"Now there are some things we should discuss at first. There is an issue with your father of course. He still believes you will become a death eater this winter vacation. You may not know that but I do and trust me, when you will go there he will force you to have the dark mark." Said Dumbledore slowly so he can get all the information clearly.  
  
"What do you suppose we do" said Draco, listening carefully. Trying hard not to miss a single word.  
  
"We must buy time, my boy" "Time is all we need" said Dumbledore.  
  
~~  
  
Hermione awoke with a gasp as she realized that she was in fact in a bathtub. The water had become so cold now and her skin has become a very pale shade of white. She quickly stood up and wrapped a towel around herself. Dried her hair with a drying spell and got dressed in her robes. She opened the bathroom door and went inside her room. She came to a stop when she saw something on her bed.  
  
This was the day she feared most. The day when her ex-boyfriend said he would come back to her.  
  
*Flashback*  
  
She was alone and effet. She had no strength anymore. Her boyfriend who she thought she can trust started abusing her , although he did not rape her he still got the best out of her. Last night was one of the worst nights ever. He has come back from school and said he would never leave her. As soon as she remembered the door to her bedroom opened and Josh walked in.  
  
"NO, leave me alone!" she said in a low tone. She was too tired to scream.  
  
"Oh no my sweet, I shall never leave you alone, that would be bad" he said in a harsh tone.  
  
He lowered his head to her ear and whispered.  
  
"You will always be mine, I better not see you with that prat anymore, what's his name...oh yes Blaise is it"  
  
This had hurt her even more. She had a late night encounter with Blaise, who was only trying to hurt her and she was trying to set free. But then Josh came and 'saved' her from him. By save she meant, only he himself can hurt her and no one else. 'Why wont he come when my father's around?' she asked herself.  
  
"I wasn't with him, he attacked me. Just like you attacked me yesterday." She said through gritted teeth.  
  
Then the living room suddenly opened and he heard her father screaming her name and calling her.  
  
He quickly got his things and went over to her one last time.  
  
"Remember this" and he threw her a rose. But not any type of rose. It was a pitch black rose.  
  
*End Flashback*  
  
There she stood, starring at the object that lay so gently on her bed.  
  
It was the black rose.  
  
Yeh this chapter included a lot of "new" things and hopefully you're not completely lost but don't worry a few more chapters and you'll understand the whole thing and trust me, its got a great plot building up. Its not only romance drama, actually it's not romance yet but it will be soon. For all you romance lovers, it's probably going to happen soon.But for now enjoy the drama of Hermione's and Draco's life.  
  
HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS CHAPTER. I KNOW, THERE ARE A LOT OF THINGS HAPPENING AND YOU PROBABLY DON'T UNDERSTAND SOME OF THEM BUT THAT'S THE BEAUTY OF LONG TWISTING STORIES, ISNT IT?  
  
ANYWAY, PLEASE GUYS, WRITE ME COMMENTS  
  
GOOD-BAD, I DON'T CARE, (well obviously I DO care and want to hear the good one's but all I'm saying is if you have anything bad to say, I still want to hear it) I WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU GUYS THINK OF THIS. I stopped writing because no one was writing to me or saying anything which made me think it was bad or just the fact that you guys don't like it.  
  
But those who did write to me, I appreciate it and my inspiration comes from you guys thanks so much!!!!  
  
3  
  
~marina 


	8. A new start

Draco was now heading back to his dormitory that he shared with the Head Girl. He said the password so fast that it came out naturally, all along thinking about what had Dumbledore just said to him. All that information was too good to be true. He never thought that this would be his way out of his dark life, but it is.  
  
He reached his room that had bold letters stamped on the door which read "Head Boy, D.M". He carefully opened the door and just realized what time it was. It was late at night, practically in the middle of the night. He had lost track of time when he was with Dumbledore.  
  
"How does that man sleep?" he said under his breath . He looked out the window and noticed that it was pitch black outside. He cautiously stepped out into his balcony that easily overlooked Hermione's which he was not aware of until now.  
  
There she was sleeping in such a tranquil way that words had lost its meanings. Her face was flawless, without a doubt Draco knew that Hermione was beautiful. "So why is so sad?" that was the question on his mind.  
  
"I want to know you, Hermione" he whispered quietly.  
  
"I want to help you." Draco realized what he had just said and thought to himself that he must have truly changed and have made a complete turn by going to the light side.  
  
He went back into his room and got into his bed.  
  
Quickly yet still slow at the same time, he dozed off but not without tracing that flawless face with his mind.  
  
Hermione took the rose in her hand and looked at it.  
  
"It's not possible" she thought.  
  
"He cannot be here, he's a muggle for crying out loud" she said with more confidence. She put her robes on and went out into the balcony. Carefully she thought about it and decided that it's best to just ignore it and finally move on. So she released this black rose into the cold and frightening air that hung loosely upon Horgwarts grounds.  
  
She looked over Draco's balcony and the fact that she can be so close to him made her feel more secure, more safe. She looked at his motionless form and saw that beautiful blond hair that hung loosely over his pale skin. She stood there wishing that if only things were better between them, if only she can make him see that she's not just a mudblood, if only she can make him understand that there is something beyond blood and money. But that soon was washed out of her head because deep down she knew that he was a Malfoy.  
  
"But he did save me" she said to herself. She hadn't even thought of that, he did in fact save her from Blaize. Would he do that if he didn't change? Not really.  
  
She looked at the time and it was already 7 o'clock in the morning.  
  
"Better get ready then, so much for a good night sleep" she said to no one in particular.  
  
She got in her room and put on a black shirt with matching black jeans. This time her jeans weren't loose at all, they were the exact opposite. She went to her dresser and opened it up to find a bottle of her favorite scented perfume, vanilla.  
  
She sprayed into the air and walked through. Then she picked her hair into a messy bun that made her look even more attractive. She applied some of her make up which was based on cover up, to cover up her scars or wounds and a black eye pencil. She finished with her eye make up and applied some cover up.  
  
"When am I going to stop with this rubbish?" she asked herself. She wasn't very fond of putting on cover up to cover her true features. But she didn't have a choice did she now?  
  
She looked at the time and saw that she had an hour left before breakfast. She instantly grabbed one of her favorite books. Hogwarts: A History, entered the common room.  
  
Draco woke up to no apparent sound, it was a reflex by now since his dad always punished him for sleeping in late. He quickly went to the bathroom and took a quick shower. Put on his black shirt and some slacks. He went out into the common room only to find Hermione absorbed in her book. Suddenly he felt himself giving in and formed a slight smile on his lips.  
  
She looks so peaceful and yet she's so troubled. "I wonder if anyone else knows?" Draco wondered. The only reason he knows is because of the fact that she forgot her secret black book and he read some of the things she wrote in there.  
  
She felt someone's eyes on her and suddenly looked up only to be met with a pair of icy blue eyes.  
  
She saw him standing there in his tranquil way with a smile on his face, she knew that smile from somewhere but couldn't connect the two.  
  
She smiled herself and found this very uncomfortable.  
  
Draco realized that she know knew that he was staring at her and the fact that she smiled at him gave him more confidence. 'Since when am I all shy around a girl?' he wondered. "Uhh...you're up early" he said. 'stupid, stupid, stupid things to say, nice going Draco' he thought angrily to himself.  
  
"Yeh I actually haven't been sleeping well all night, so I guess this is what I get" she said still keeping her beautiful smile.  
  
She suddenly got the urge to thank him for what he did but didn't know what she should do. She slowly got up and walked a few towards him.  
  
"Malfoy... I ... just wanted to...to" she was silenced by his hand going up as a signal to stop her.  
  
"Don't worry about it. I'm just glad I was there." That's all it took for Hermione to drool over his words.  
  
Draco made his way towards the exit, stopped and without turning around to face her he said.  
  
"And Granger" her eyes looked up to be met with his back.  
  
"He won't be a bother to you anymore" with that final statement, he left leaving Hermione to wonder about what could have happened to him.  
  
She gathered her robes, put them on and left to the Great Hall for breakfast. She was walking fast through the hallway when suddenly someone smashed themselves into her.  
  
"Watch it mudblood" it was the cold and vicious voice of Pansy Parkinson.  
  
'Great, that's exactly what I need right now, another encounter with the Lord himself would just do my day' she thought to herself sarcastically. She opened the door that lead her to the Great Hall and went to sit with her friends.  
  
"Hi Harry, Ron" she said with no expression on her face.  
  
"Hermione...is everything all right?" asked Harry.  
  
"What makes you think something is wrong?" she replied.  
  
"Well you haven't been down here a lot and we don't see you in the hallways" he said.  
  
"Yeh, we miss you Mione" said Ron with a mouth full of food.  
  
"Oh I know you guys, but its just this Head Girl business is really taken over me" she replied lying. She hated lying to her friends, especially Harry. She knew that deep down he knows she's covering up for something, but he would never push her into saying anything further... hopefully. "Aww...well you can come back to us anytime Mione, if you want that is" said Ron drinking his Pumpkin Juice.  
  
Harry looked at her suspiciously.  
  
'Why are you hiding from me Hermione?' he thought to himself. 'What's troubling you?'  
  
Hermione looked into Harry's eyes and saw sadness and hurt. She tried so hard to fight back the threatening tears that were about to come but she couldn't. A single tear rolled down her cheek and Harry instantly picked up his hand to brush it off. All along, Ron was ignorant to what was happening between the two.  
  
"Harry...I..." she tried to tell him but she was interrupted.  
  
"Don't worry Hermione, when you feel like talking... I'll be here" he said looking deeply into her caramel eyes.  
  
"Pansy you abhorrent and heinous human, GET OFF!" Draco screamed at the girl who was trying so hard to sit on his lap.  
  
"Fine, but I bet you if I was that filthy mudblood you wouldn't say that, would you Draco?" she said, trying so hard to make a hurtful face instead making a face that looked that some horse had run over it...five times.  
  
Draco thought to himself for a minute. 'How dare she call her that, she's not a mudblood and she certainly isn't filthy'. But he couldn't do anything about that.  
  
"What are you talking about, Parkinson?" he said, trying to avoid the fact that he was indeed looking for a girl dressed in black with caramel hair to match her eyes.  
  
"I can see right through you." With that she left. 'Finally' he thought, at least she wont be a bother to him anymore. Then his eyes landed on Hermione and he noticed that she looked pretty hurt.  
  
'If that Weasel or Potty did something to her...wait a minute, why am I so worried about Granger?' then he saw that she was about to cry and a tear slipped on her cheek. Suddenly he saw Potter's hand wipe that tear away.  
  
'That should be me, wiping her tears away' he thought to himself. He couldn't hide it anymore. Draco definitely had feelings for Hermione Granger.  
  
He got up from his table and walked out of the Great Hall.  
  
"Thank You Harry, I will" said Hermione wrapping her arms around him for a hug.  
  
"Anytime Mione, anytime" replied Harry.  
  
Hermione's eyes shot up as she saw the boy with platinum blond hair exit the Great Hall.  
  
'Why is he leaving?' she thought subconsciously.  
  
She gathered her books and went out of the Great Hall, trying to catch Draco.  
  
She walked around and saw him no where, she checked the watch and found out that she had about 20 minutes to waste. 'Oh well, nothing better than a nice walk'  
  
She walked out onto Hogwarts grounds trying to spot the lake she saw from her balcony.  
  
Hermione walked to the lake and suddenly she saw that single person who she longed to find.  
  
He was sitting on an enormous rock with his hands on both of his legs. He looked so serene as if someone had put a curse on him to stay there, motionless. Draco thought that he was being watched so he abruptly looked up and found Hermione standing there.  
  
"How do you know this place?" he asked her, getting up from his rock.  
  
"I..uh...saw it from my window" she said.  
  
"No you didn't" he said looking away from her.  
  
"You saw it from your balcony." He said looking back at her with a slight smile.  
  
"How did you..."  
  
"Because from your window you can only see the Forbidden Forest and that's about all there is to it. But from your balcony you can see this lake and of course my bedroom including a nice view of my, may I add very comfortable, bed." He said with a smirk on his face.  
  
"That's not true, wait how do you know the view of my window and my balcony?" she said desperately trying to change the subject.  
  
"Well, well Miss Granger, for someone so smart, I'd think you can connect the two. When I carried you to your bed I looked around...only to check if they gave you a better view that me of course, which obviously they didn't" he trying to cover up the fact that he was looking around her room without her permission.  
  
He saw her look confused and suddenly thought of the next best thing to say before she completely understands.  
  
He started heading towards the castle, when at the last moment he turned around and said  
  
"Oh and don't think I didn't see you looking at me at night, Granger" he smiled and left for class. 


	9. Watching Him Sleep

Hermione tossed and turned in her bed. She couldn't sleep, all those eyes betraying her, cursing her, burning through her soul, she couldn't take it anymore. It had been just a few days ago that she came to Hogwarts and already rumors spread about her. About her clothing style, her attitude, her behavior and all she can do is listen. Listen to the rumors that aren't true.  
  
She got up from her bed and looked outside her window it was pitch black. She put on her robe and went outside her room. Going down the cold stairs that divide into two paths, one lead to the common room that she shared with Malfoy and the second lead to his room which she has never even come close to...yet.  
  
She reached his door and hesitated for a moment.  
  
"Wonder how it looks like" she whispered. Although in her mind she was screaming at herself for being so weak as to use that line as an excuse to enter his room.  
  
She turned the knob and entered his room. She really didn't know what lead her here, but her feet seemed to know where they were going and so she trusted her senses. All she could see was the darkness that gently covered his room.  
  
'I bet his colors are silver and green' she thought. Knowing his Slytherin pride she quickly assumed his room would contain of silver and green.  
  
Her eyes adjusted to the light in the room which was barely visible and so she found herself standing next to him, looking down at him. She stood there frozen, not knowing what to do she took in his furtive handsomeness. He really did remind her of that unicorn she saw in her dreams...with blond hair, blue eyes, and a muscular body. He fit the description so perfectly.  
  
'If only he truly was an angel' she though to herself. 'If only you can take me away from my pain'. A distinct tear rolled down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away and sat on the edge of his bed. His head was turned away from her and his hair was hanging over his forehead.  
  
Subconsciously she picked up her hand and touched his cold cheek.  
  
'He's so cold and yet it's hot in his room' she thought.  
  
Then surprising her, he turned his head towards her and slightly moved his body so that he was closer to her.  
  
She didn't know what exactly she was doing. But she had this feeling that once she would do it, she would make herself see what forcing is and how true feelings can be.  
  
She leaned her head and slowly touched his lips with hers.  
  
'He has such soft lips' was her first thought. Then she was interrupted by him responding.  
  
He subconsciously kissed her back.  
  
'This is bad, he doesn't even know who I am' she thought. She broke the kiss and finally looked into his blue eyes. He's awake.  
  
"Granger?" was the first thing she heard.  
  
She quickly stood up.  
  
"I—uhh...I'm so sorry...I was just going to—to tell you –that—that..." she stammered very uncomfortably.  
  
Malfoy quickly took in what had just happened and controlled his blush that was desperately trying to show. A slow smirk was spreading on his lips.  
  
"Granger...it's all right" he said smirking.  
  
"What I truly want to know is why you chose to kiss me" he said, standing up from his bed and coming closer to her; very slowly.  
  
"I...you wouldn't understand" she said with more power than before. She completely relaxed now that she saw he wasn't freaked out by what had happened.  
  
He stopped smirking and put on a face that showed no expressions what so ever. He stopped coming closer to her and instead turned to his wardrobe. Quickly he got out his robe, put it onto himself and looked at Hermione. She was now entering his balcony. He went over to her and stood very close to her, so close that he can smell that vanilla scent he had dreamed about.  
  
"Gra—Hermione...I don't want you to look at me like that ...again" he said.  
  
She suddenly turned around to find him standing very close to her.  
  
"Like what?" she questioned.  
  
"Like you hate me...like you can't trust me...like"  
  
"You honestly think I hate you?" She said, somewhat hurt and yet happy at the same time.  
  
"Well...you should, I mean I was rude and completely stupid for calling you all those names which you didn't deserve." He said, trying desperately to form an apology.  
  
"I forgave you a long time ago, Malfoy" she said remembering the day when he saved her from possible yet constant rape.  
  
"You know you didn't have to save me...I mean they're not going to stop, If it's not him than it's someone else" tears rolled down her cheeks.  
  
She felt a cold hand touch her chin and bring her face up. Draco looked at her beautiful face and felt so horrible for not doing anything about her pain.  
  
"Hermione...I won't let them do this to you anymore...I—I promise" he said.  
  
She suddenly looked into his eyes.  
  
"Don't make promises you can't keep, Draco" She started to walk away when she felt his hand grad hers and turn her around to him. Next thing she knew, he had kissed her on her gently lips. It was hard at first then she felt those soft lips caressing her own. It was probably the best feeling she had felt.  
  
He continued kissing her softly on her fragile lips. 'Merlin, she even tastes sweet' he thought.  
  
Once he stopped and finally looked into her eyes he saw so many emotions flashing through her eyes. One thing he definitely saw was perplexity. He suddenly felt bad for taking advantage of her and stepped back. His face screwed up in confusion and he couldn't even look at her. Here she is standing in front of him, so weak, so distraught and he just comes out kissing her so harshly. Almost breaking her.  
  
"No, no this can't be" he whispered only for himself but she heard.  
  
Suddenly she felt more pain than ever, she felt like she was being broken into tiny pieces of glass.  
  
'How can he just kiss me one second and say it's wrong the next' without any further explanation and wondering she ran out of his room and straight into hers. She locked the door and went over to the balcony. She looked at him standing there and felt her heart ache with such emotion which was very much unknown to her.  
  
She went to her bed and curled her whole body in a position of a ball. She hugged her knees tightly and said to herself...  
  
"This cannot happen, this cannot happen...I cannot fall for him" she said over and over.  
  
Draco wanted to run after her and to tell her that he didn't mean it in THAT way. He just couldn't do that to her, he couldn't break her heart, she has so much to deal with and now here he comes with another problem for her to solve.  
  
Just now he realized that Hermione Granger meant something to him. And probably more than he thinks. He wanted to come into her room and hold her close to him, hold her so she wont cry anymore, so she wont be troubled anymore. But that can't happen. What about what people would say...what about his classmates and his "so called girlfriend, Pansy" which by the he is suppose to be dating right now.  
  
"Ughh...why her...why couldn't I fall for the next Slytherin girl?" 


	10. The Talk

Its been a week, a whole week and nothing has happened. She hasn't said anything to him. She has been afraid to look him in the eye. She fears that he will find out exactly how weak she is when it comes to this. She cannot tell right now whether she will be able to take it now but she tries, she tries so hard...for him not to know.  
  
Draco has been upset with his actions and he is being to stubborn about the whole situation. He thinks that telling her the truth will lead to nothing. He thinks she is still afraid of him and that she does not want to speak to him at all. He's got a reason to think this because of the way she's been hiding from him. This whole situation is driving him mad, he cannot sleep at night, thinking that the girl who he fears the most of hurting is right next door.  
  
Its 3 A.M in the morning and the two confused teenagers are wide awake, laying in their beds. Telling themselves, forcing themselves to sleep, yet none will follow the order.  
  
Hermione gets out of the bed and goes over to the mirror and looks at herself.  
  
"I'm not THAT ugly am I?" she asks quietly.  
  
"Not at all" replied the mirror.  
  
She is not surprised by the talking mirrors, in fact she's quiet used to everything being the way they are.  
  
"Then why does he not like me?" she whispers.  
  
"Oh dear, I'm not so good with teenage romance" answered the mirror.  
  
"Ha , teenager romance? Do you honestly think anyone will ever want to even think about having some sort of 'teenage romance' with me." She said a bit louder.  
  
"I mean...what good will it do for them. It seems as though all my life I have been watching this horrifying and horrendous movie that's filled with pain and anguish and that just...wont...end" she said quietly.  
  
"Oh my sweet, do not be alarmed by something that Is about to end" said the mirror.  
  
"End? My life wont just end...I believe we will have to work on that and that means it will require some blades or if we want to do it the quiet way, just some good pills" said Hermione sarcastically.  
  
"I know you are just playing with words Hermione dear, but it is not safe to do that, not when you don't know the full truth" replied the mirror.  
  
Hermione started to take small steps to the balcony.  
  
"I'd be careful if I were you, dear" commented the mirror.  
  
"What are you talking about?" said Hermione looking back at the mirror. She was just a few steps away from the balcony.  
  
"Well, nothing can come good from watching others" said the mirror.  
  
"Are you commenting on me watching Malfoy? That's just crazy, I just feel a little nauseous so I thought I would step out for some fresh air" lied Hermione. She wanted to see him, his beautiful blond locks of hair, his wonderfully shaped face, and his eyes that just pull her in so deeply.  
  
"Lying to yourself isn't the best way to go" said the mirror quietly.  
  
She opened the doors and hesitated to look his way for just that second. Then she saw him, standing right by the balcony door, starring up at the moon. She ducked and hid herself in a far dark corner where he wont be able to see her. She watching him through the dimness and the fog. He had on black slacks that suited him perfectly and nothing on top.  
  
"Why isn't he sleeping?" said Hermione quietly.  
  
There he was, standing without a shirt and just being who he truly is. A decent human being who she longs to be with.  
  
He had just stepped outside and the wind had gotten stronger. She saw him looking at her balcony and then he squinted his eyes just a bit and was looking at something in particular.  
  
She followed his gaze and realized that she had forgot to close the door.  
  
'Oh no, the door!' she thought to herself. But just as she was thinking this the wind blew so hard with all its will and shut the door before her reflexes got to her and she stormed out of the dark corner, reaching out her hand in order to catch the door. But it was all too late.  
  
Draco saw the night was beautiful so he decided he should step out. He stepped out and it had suddenly gotten so chilly. He quickly looked at Hermione's door.  
  
'Why did she leave it open, it's freezing outside' he thought to himself.  
  
Just then the door was being shut by the forces of the wind and he sees her, the most enticing person of all jump out, trying to save the door from being completely closed.  
  
And she fails miserably.  
  
Unable to speak, unable to think, there she was, the girl who haunts his dreams every night. The girl who he thinks is the most decent, beautiful, respectful, and diligent human being.  
  
"Hermione" he said in a fair voice.  
  
"What are you doing out there, in the middle of the night" then it hit him, like a brick in the face.  
  
'Why was she hiding all this time while I was out here'  
  
'She knew I was here'  
  
"I..uh I didn't know that you were out, honestly, I just stepped out for some fresh air" she said, desperately trying to sound real and that she really wasn't trying to spy on him.  
  
Draco quickly summed up what has happened and started to smile just a tad.  
  
Hermione seeing his change in appearance started feeling uncomfortable.  
  
"What...What are you making fun of me now" she said.  
  
"First you turn me down, now you laugh right in my face" she said in an angry tone.  
  
He couldn't believe his ears. Had she really thought that he would turn down such a beauty?  
  
"Well I won't be your little puppet, Malfoy" she screamed.  
  
Hermione quickly ran to the door and burst it open, trying frantically to get away from him so he can bring her down even more than she already is.  
  
"WHAT!" Draco screamed at no one.  
  
"You really think that do you, Hermione?" he said to her closed door. Knowing that she can still hear him.  
  
"Well if you'd rather believe whatever the hell you MADE UP, then fine by me!" he screamed harshly at the door, thinking she heard everything.  
  
He stormed back into his room and tried to rationally think this over.  
  
'Why did I get mad at her?'  
  
'Why did I scream at her?'  
  
"Ugh...I'm such a pathetic person" he said, sitting on his bed. What he has done really wasn't the right thing to do. Draco was too caught up in the moment that he completely lost it and said the first thing that came to mind. He just couldn't believe that this, what she had said, was what she was thinking all along.  
  
'I have to talk to her' he pondered to himself.  
  
His decision was made, by night tomorrow, she shall speak to Hermione.  
  
Hermione quickly ran to the bathroom and closed the door. She stripped off all of her clothes and turned on the water for the bathtub. She chose her favorite scent, vanilla and was welcomed by a marvelous smell that drove her into greater insanity.  
  
There she was, filled with ecstasy and over what?  
  
A vanilla scented bath gel.  
  
Funny how little things can make a person fall so deeply into an awe- inspiring bliss.  
  
There she was, laying in the water, completely oblivious to the fact that the person who she longed to be with was wishing the same thing.  
  
Hermione woke up and felt like she was soaked in water. She put her hand against her forehead and felt it very warm and sweaty.  
  
'Might as well take another shower...all these dreams seem to have a continues effect on me'  
  
She stepped into the shower and started washing herself.  
  
'How am I suppose to face him tomorrow during the meeting' she thought.  
  
"Ugh...oh well. It's just another normal thing that I have to face from now on" she said to herself.  
  
She stepped out and looked around the bathroom for any sign of towels that were colored gold.  
  
'Oh no, I spent them all yesterday' she thought to herself.  
  
There was only that single green towel that was in fact, Draco's.  
  
"Would he really see me, and plus he doesn't count how many towels he has right" she said. All along taking his towel and wrapping it around her body.  
  
She let her damped hair down and looked at her reflection in the mirror.  
  
"Well, at least all those summer getaways from my dad gave me a nice looking tan" she said to herself.  
  
She turned the knob and was about to exit when she saw that messy blond haired Slytherin with his hand reaching the knob.  
  
He looked up surprised and quickly adjusted his eyes to what was in front of him.  
  
'Oh no, and I was worried about him seeing me during the meeting' she quickly thought.  
  
"Wow...uh I mean...I'm sorry I didn't think anyone was in the bathroom" he said and quickly turned away.  
  
She stood there paralyzed by his actions.  
  
"It's all right Malfoy, I'm pretty decent" she laughed a little.  
  
She had to admit to herself, it was an adorable picture if you were to look at it from a different point of view. He, Draco Malfoy was completely blushing in front her just because she came out with nothing but a towel.  
  
He slowly turned around and saw that she was smiling so he went along with it.  
  
He gave her one of his all knowing charming smiles that can get him any girls he want.  
  
'There's that smile that I cannot bare to see' she thought. 'He's just so perfect, even when he just woke up and didn't do anything to himself'  
  
"Is it me or has the all-knowing Granger finally opened her eyes and is checking me out, right this moment...as we speak, may I say" he said smirking. All along Draco couldn't help but not to look at that gorgeous petite body that was right in front of him.  
  
Long slender legs that he could just not get enough off broke all the concentration be was saving.  
  
"I'd say the same about you, Mr.Malfoy" she said quickly and ran off to her room.  
  
"So she did notice" he said watching her leave.  
  
The day turned out to be the longest day of Draco's life. Finally he couldn't wait until dinner so later on he can tell his feelings to Hermione. Finally he can tell her the things he hides, the things that are just meant to be said, the things that might have a positive and a negative effect.  
  
It was the last class to lunch and he had to share it with Gryffindors.  
  
He walked smoothly into the class and noticed that there was a different girl sitting next to his place by the desk.  
  
"Where's Parkinson?" he said in a nonchalant voice meanwhile at the same time looking over at the Gryffindors, trying to see if his little victim has come into class yet.  
  
"Well, well, isn't this a nice 'Hello'" the girl answered.  
  
He looked back her way and saw that she was another copy of Parkinson but with Black hair.  
  
"You suppose to be her cousin?" he said once again without a touch of care.  
  
"You know, they say that you're supposed to be this nice smooth talker when it comes to girls" she said eyeing him.  
  
"Yeh...when it comes to, what are they known as...ahh pretty girls" he said in a calm voice.  
  
"Now if you don't mind, I'd like you to kindly remove your eyes from my body and step aside, as it seems you have taken both these seats" he said looking down at the two seats which she put her things on.  
  
He looked around and saw an isolated desk in the back. Draco quickly made his way to it with his robes flashing behind him. He put all his things down and saw that she still hasn't come in yet.  
  
'Wonder where Ms.Perfect is' he thought.  
  
'Well...I don't know about perfect, anymore' he thought with a smile as he remembered the beautiful picture that has haunted him all day today. Hermione in nothing but a towel and whose towel, now that was a good question.  
  
She chose his Slytherin towel.  
  
'Now that was a vicious idea' he thought pertaining to the whole towel image.  
  
Snape had walked in the class and still no Hermione, now he was starting to get worried.  
  
Just as Snape had said  
  
"Turn to page 924"  
  
His little victim had finally shown up. She opened the doors harshly and walked in, saw that there was no room by Harry and Ron. They saw her and mouthed 'Sorry' and all she can do was look for another seat.  
  
She looked in back and saw Malfoy sitting alone with a smile on his face.  
  
Quickly she regained her strength and sat by his side.  
  
Malfoy was completely shocked. Why did she sit here, was there not enough space. He looked at where Potty and Weasley sat and saw that there really was no more seats.  
  
Then he saw Potty turn around and magically throw a piece of parchment aiming at Hermione's desk.  
  
He saw how the paper ball hit Hermione in her arm and how she looked around the class, trying to find who did it.  
  
She was so predictable. Completely oblivious, Hermione opened the parchment and read whatever what was written there. She looked up at Potter and gave a quick nod as agreeing to something he didn't quiet know, yet.  
  
What she didn't know was the fact that Draco was completely studying her every movement.  
  
She relaxed and noticed that her hair was falling apart from the messy bun she made in the morning. So she untangled it and let it fall to her shoulders, then hastily she made it back into a messy bun that made her look very attractive. The smell of her hair had gotten to Draco and he just couldn't take it anymore.  
  
First the smell of vanilla drove him into a complete state of psychosis whenever she walked by him and now a different smell that was just as powerful and just as intoxicating. He was extremely prickly.  
  
But what he was unaware of was that every action he made, Hermione was in deep awareness of his next step.  
  
Whenever he picked up his hand to stroke his hair in a swift movement to keep it from falling in his face, she dreamt that it was her hand. Whenever he moved or got up from his chair, this exhilarating smell of his cologne drove her into madness.  
  
She switched positions so that now she was sitting with both her legs were on the ground and they were a little far apart from each other.  
  
While these two teenagers were all caught up in each others acts, they were completely unaware of what was happening in the classroom. Not that they cared but Hermione is definitely not the type of person who would miss a whole class session just to look and be completely absorbed in the person sitting next to her.  
  
Then she saw him move uncomfortably and felt his leg against hers.  
  
'Should I move my leg?' she thought rapidly to herself.  
  
Draco was also battling his thoughts right now.  
  
'She's so warm and welcoming' he thought.  
  
'No, stop thinking this!' he quickly held his thoughts from going any further.  
  
She slowly moved her leg up while still connected to his. Draco seeing this, thought that she was telling him something which she really wasn't, she just didn't want to give him the wrong idea.  
  
Just when he was about to say something, class was being dismissed and she quickly ran out of the classroom with Potter not so far behind her.  
  
"Damn that Potter!" he cursed under his breath.  
  
The day went on and classes seemed to be longer and longer. Finally it was time for dinner, an event right before the meeting and after the meeting he can at last talk to Hermione.  
  
He made his way to the Slytherin table and noticed that annoying girl was sitting by his seat again. Draco walked up to his minions and took a seat far away from her. He started looking around for his little brown haired beauty. There she was sitting and she looked like she was in deep conversation with that Potter again.  
  
"You really hate him don't you Draco" said Goyle.  
  
He snapped out of his daze and replied to what his minion number one said.  
  
"Yeh, Goyle, I really do" he said in a vicious voice.  
  
"Hey, Draco, I bet this will make you happy. Looks like that mudblood of his is getting quiet the action" Draco looked at Goyle with a murderous face and stopped himself before hexing him for saying that kind of thing about Hermione.  
  
"Nah...I don't think she'd be with a twat like that" he said in a some what normal voice.  
  
"Yeh, I don't know about that, guys at Quiddich have been saying some nice things about her" he said with a mouth full of food.  
  
This got him even more pissed of than he was already.  
  
"Said what?"  
  
"Uh..I don't know, I don't really remember much...but I think they said something about her sleeping with Weasley and now she's with Potter. That's why she doesn't really talk to the Red Head" he said not caring at all.  
  
"No...it's a lie" he said through gritted teeth.  
  
"Calm down Draco, what do you actually LIKE the mudblood" he said.  
  
"DON'T" he screamed. He wanted to finish it off by saying the whole 'don't call her that' phrase but he saw who was watching him and that must have been the whole Great Hall. The position he was in surprised himself and he just couldn't take it anymore. Everyone was looking at him, he turned her way and saw that she was frightened by his actions so he quickly let go and strode off, out of the Great Hall.  
  
He knew where the meeting would take place so he went directly there.  
  
'How could she? I thought she actually liked me' he thought.  
  
'No, No it was all a lie, he doesn't know what he's thinking, he's so dull and completely gullible that he'll believe a fish spoke to him'  
  
He went inside the room and stayed there until people had finally started to arrive. All giving him these weird looks and all whispering amongst each other.  
  
All through out the meeting he didn't dare to look at her. He thought that he should save all he can for the conversation he was going to have with her, once and for all.  
  
At last, the meeting finished and everyone went off. While he was collecting his thing he noticed that she was the first to go.  
  
'Looks like someone's in the mood to sleep' he thought.  
  
He was going up the steps and thinking over how he should start the conversation and what he should really talk about.  
  
'How about...Hermione we need to talk, No, no, no, what am I, her father?' he thought to himself. Draco opened the doors that led him to the Common Room that he and Hermione shared.  
  
Then what he saw completely froze his whole body and he was unable to move nor to function.  
  
There she was sitting on the couch with someone else's lips on hers.  
  
It was Harry Potter.  
  
"So it's true!" he screamed.  
  
Hermione pushed Harry away and saw Draco standing by the doorway.  
  
'Oh no, he must think-' her thoughts were interrupted by Harry yelling back at Draco.  
  
"What the hell Ferret, shouldn't you be with your cronies in the Slytherin Dark Room?" he said.  
  
"Harry" Hermione tried to say something. "Don't"  
  
"You bloody twat!" Draco screamed.  
  
"GET OUT!" she screamed. They both looked at her.  
  
"Well, you heard her" said Harry.  
  
"Not him, you" she said in a calm voice.  
  
"What?" "Hermione, have you gone mad?"  
  
"No, I'm perfectly fine" she said taking something that was on the couch and throwing it at his face.  
  
He caught it and stormed out of the room.  
  
She stood there, tear strained face but beautiful overall.  
  
"So this is why you stormed out of the meeting, to go off snogging Potter"  
  
"Hope you had fun" he said and without any further explanation he went off to his room.  
  
HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOYED THIS CHAPTER...SORRY FOR NOT WRITING FOR SUCH A LOOOONG TIME. BUT NO NEED TO WORRY...I'M FINALLY GETTING BACK ON TRACK.  
  
This chapter took me two days to write, so it better be a good one. Tell me what you think.  
  
Special thanks and lots of love to PineappleCube you gotta love her. (  
  
And a whole lots of thanks to you reviewers who are anonymous which sucks because I cant really reply to you. But hopefully you read this part.  
  
THANKS FOR SPENDING YOUR TIME, READING MY STORY!!!  
  
Marina 


	11. Explanations

EXPLANATIONS  
  
'I cannot believe her!' Draco fumed about a little encounter that Hermione had with Harry.  
  
"And I actually wanted to tell her how I felt" he said in a whisper.  
  
He really couldn't believe his luck. There she was locking lips with another boy when she should be his, for that was all he thought.  
  
But it wasn't any boy, it had to be the mighty boy-who-lived, Harry Potter.  
  
'He's got everything, why does he want her?' Draco thought to himself.  
  
After long and quiet hours of thinking about the situation at hand he thought that the best solution would just be to ignore her. He would go back to being mean and coldhearted Malfoy so then she would feel terrible whenever he called her a 'mudblood'.  
  
He wanted so bad to show her how it pained for him to see her with Potter. But unfortunately he couldn't come up with any thoughts about that plan because deep down he knew that Hermione really didn't like him.  
  
At least that's what young Draco thought.  
  
Hermione sat there alone and empty, once again her day was ruined.  
  
Thinking of Harry said to herself. "Why did he have to come?"  
  
Finally by the looks of today's morning when she had a flirtatious encounter with Malfoy, she thought she would finally tell him once and for all how she really felt and get it over with.  
  
She sat there in her big comfy chair that faced the balcony and closed her eyes. Visions of Draco's hurtful face flashed throughout her mind.  
  
But what she really couldn't get her mind of were his last words that rang in her ears.  
  
-Snogging Potter...Hope you had fun...hope you had fun...snogging.....Potter...had fun-  
  
She opened her eyes and felt tears stream down her face. She quickly wiped them away and stood up.  
  
All the noise, all the visions, all the senseless faces of Draco were driving her mad.  
  
"Argg...!!" she screamed and was pleased to find nothing but silence.  
  
'Don't think' she thought to herself.  
  
"Just do it" she said quietly.  
  
Completely oblivious to what she was wearing she rushed through her door and went to search for Draco's door.  
  
There it was isolated from the rest of the Common Room. To her surprise it wasn't locked so she entered the room and noticed that the lights were completely off and it was dark in the room. The only visible light was coming from the balcony which had the doors open and so she quickly inspected the room and went by the bed to find ruffled sheets that were the color of green.  
  
'Typical Slytherin'  
  
She looked up and saw him standing there on the balcony looking out onto the lake. He was just perfect, he had a sweater on and some slacks and yet he still managed to look so handsome with his platinum blond hair being thrown from side to side with the forces of the wind.  
  
Draco stood there on his balcony trying to erase whatever thoughts and feelings he had about Hermione. Trying to find some slimy insults about her just to get on her nerves and to pay her back. But it was all useless.  
  
Truth be told, he couldn't come up with anything other than the same old 'Mudblood' and 'Know-it-all' which she certainly was not. She is the smartest witch on Hogwarts grounds without a doubt and she certainly wasn't filthy.  
  
There he goes again, defending someone who he can never have.  
  
He turned around and headed for his room. Since it was really dark in the room he didn't even see the girl who watched him so carefully stand next to his bed.  
  
Hermione was not functioning at all. She saw him coming back and suddenly she felt her stomache do flips but then when he didn't see her, she calmed down a bit. She was still in that phase of not thinking and just acting.  
  
Draco quickly closed the doors and as soon as he was inside he felt incredibly hot so he took off his sweater which got tangled up with his undershirt.  
  
With his shirt and sweater wrapped up in each other he looked up and was bewildered by the surprise he got. His one and only victim stood there, before him.  
  
"What are you doing here Her-Granger?" he asked in a calm voice like this was normal, finding the girl he longs to be with in his room.  
  
She just stood there, unable to speak but her actions took over her mind and so slowly came up to him.  
  
"Uh... what are you doing?" he asked with a bit of unsure ness in his voice.  
  
"I'm...I'm sorry" she said finally getting back to her senses she realized how close she was to him and took a step back.  
  
"I ...tried to ...get him out" she said quietly.  
  
"Yeah, Don't worry about it Granger" he said now in a complete voice. He knew that she was hiding something but could it be that she was hiding the fact that she really is with Potter? That description didn't quiet fit her.  
  
"What...you believe me?" she asked.  
  
"I believe what I hear" was all he said.  
  
She couldn't believe him, Draco wasn't the type that would just listen to whatever people say, is he?  
  
"Oh yeah, and what might that be?" she said with a touch of angriness.  
  
"Just what every damn person is talking about" he screamed.  
  
"You know, I actually thought you'd understand" she said quietly.  
  
Hermione started to walk out the door when she heard him start to talk.  
  
"I do...I mean...I did, until today's lovely evening I was about to talk to you about something, no matter what those pricks say" he said looking at her back.  
  
She was wearing loose bed pants and a t-shirt that fit her just perfectly. Her shirt had come up just before the belly button and she was now revealing her flat stomach just a bit.  
  
She slowly turned around and thought it would be best if she were to just say what happened that night.  
  
"He told me Ginny was cheating on him...and I felt bad so I" she was interrupted by Draco.  
  
"What? You had to kiss him!" he screamed.  
  
Hermione felt like she was being degraded by such a silly thing. She felt worthless, If he didn't believe her than he is free to think whatever he desires.  
  
"And who are you to tell me who I should kiss and who I shouldnt? Huh...when have you even cared one bit about me, Malfoy" she screamed back at him. Now she was ready to throw all the insults she had.  
  
"And plus, if you had listened and not interrupt me, I was about to say that, when he had told me that, I did in fact feel sorry for him but that was all vanished when he made a move on me...and that's when you stormed in" she screamed back at him.  
  
"I do care about you!" He said in a low voice, almost inaudible and realized what he had just said. Draco wasn't really listening to what she started saying after she said the first part about him not caring.  
  
He quickly turned around and put his hands to his head.  
  
"What?" came a quiet reply from Hermione.  
  
"Forget it...forget I ever said anything" he said in a calm voice.  
  
Hermione walked up to Draco and stood in back of him for a moment.  
  
"No...don't forget about it, or if you do, I'll go mad" she said with a slight smile on her face.  
  
He turned around and saw that she was right there standing so close to him.  
  
"Merlin Hermione that's what I wanted to tell you...I cant go on like this...I need you to be with me...I'm lost and I can't concentrate" he said quietly just so she can hear.  
  
"Oh Draco, why did you keep quiet all this time? Do you know exactly how you tormented me?" she said looking in his eyes.  
  
Hermione was now smiling so brightly and was blushing a deep shade of red that she had to bring her head down so he won't see.  
  
Draco hesitated for a minute about whether this was wise or not but decided against it. He picked up his hand and brought it to her cheek.  
  
"I was afraid and stupid." He said quietly.  
  
"Afraid...afraid of what?" she said with a questioned look on her face.  
  
"That you might run away or laugh or...well I can think of a lot of things you could have done to me" he said with a slight smile forming on his lips.  
  
He gently tilted her head so that she was looking at him.  
  
"Draco...what about what you said...you cant 'have this' "she remembered the first time when they shared their kiss, he said those specific words.  
  
"I was afraid I'd hurt you...Hermione, I don't want to be that person who you fear." He said looking straight into her eyes.  
  
"I want to be there with you, by your side" he continued.  
  
Hermione felt like her whole world was finally shining on her like a crazy diamond. She was speechless. She had never felt this type of emotion with anyone, including Josh.  
  
The she remembered him and how he had tortured her. All those days which led to months of torment has kept her shut from the world.  
  
She felt like she was reborn.  
  
"Hermione...what's wrong?" he asked her, noticing that she had tears in her eyes that rolled down her cheek.  
  
She looked up at him and smiled. For the first time, the boy standing in front of her did not cause these tears. They were tears of relief.  
  
He now snaked his arms around her waist and brought her so close to him that he can feel her warm stomach against his skin. She raised both of her hands slowly tracing his muscular arms and went up to his neck.  
  
They stood there in this position for the remaining time.  
  
"Nothing, I'm just thinking about how stupid you could have been to actually think that I would kiss Harry" she said with a smile.  
  
He smiled back and said in a low husky voice.  
  
"I know you're not stupid enough to chose a Gryffindor like him over a Slytherin like...oh lets say, me" he replied with a devilish smirk on his face.  
  
He took one of his hands and touched her warm cheek with it, then he brought her delicate face to his and their lips have locked in a passionate kiss.  
  
They both stopped themselves to catch some air. Draco kissed her nose and rested his forehead against hers.  
  
"Oh...what took you so long?" she asked in a quiet voice.  
  
"Distractions my sweet" he said with a slight smile Hermione also smiled.  
  
"By the way, its true what they say about Gryffindors" he said.  
  
"Oh yeah, and what's that?" she asked.  
  
"You are brave...to come here, in a Slytherins room in the middle of the night" he said with a smirk. He gave her a final kiss and picked her up in his arms.  
  
"As much as I would love to chat with you my love, I think you were falling asleep on me in there" he said with a smile. Hermione yawned and smiled into his neck.  
  
He gently lay her down on her bed and tucked her in.  
  
"Now that's not fair, I feel like you're my Mother" she said with a sad expression of her face. Draco seeing this did the best he can do.  
  
"Really, well would your mother do this" and he bent down and gave her another one of his passionate kisses. This time Hermione had welcomed his tongue with hers and they were both amazed at how wonderful the sensation can really be. She wrapped her hands around his neck and pulled him down on her. Then both broke free and just stared at each other in amazement.  
  
"Wow...now THAT was unexpected" he said with a flushed face.  
  
"Never knew you had a wild side to you, Granger" he said.  
  
"And I never knew that you haven't experienced that, Malfoy" she said with a smile.  
  
"I did too!" he said in defense.  
  
"I just didn't enjoy it as I did, now" he said more quieter.  
  
Hermione started to blush uncontrollably.  
  
"Merlin, you look so beautiful when you blush" he said and got up from her bed.  
  
Draco gave her a final kiss on her lips and started to leave her room.  
  
"Oh and Draco..." she started to say. Draco had now already reached the door and turned around to hear what she has to say.  
  
"I hope you don't walk around shirtless with all the girls" she said.  
  
"And I hope you don't wear that incredibly tight and not to mention, small shirt around the boys" he said with a wicked smile on his face and closed the door.  
  
Just when Hermione thought she can finally sleep so she can wake up and be with him again, the doors open and in comes Draco. He walked up to her bed, leaned down and whispered.  
  
"Because only I'm allowed to see that shirt on you" he said and kissed her on the lips.  
  
And with that final statement he left.  
  
HOPE YOU LIKED THIS CHAPTER AS MUCH AS I LIKED WRITING IT.  
  
FROM NOW ON, ALL YOU ROMANTIC SOULS OUT THERE, THIS IS WHERE IT ALL STARTS AND THE DRAMA OF HERMIONE'S LIFE ENDS.  
  
But do not worry yourself to much, there are plenty of twists yet to come.  
  
B.T.W Harry is not really being a good friend. He made a move on Hermione!!  
  
PLEASE R&R!!!!! I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY, WHETHER IT BE ABOUT YOUR VISIT TO THE DOCTOR OR HOW YOUR PET JUST LEARNED A NEW TRICK...I'M ALL EARS. Hehe.  
  
Well, not really, don't tell me about your pets or your visits to the doctor, I just want to know what you think of my story!!!!!!!! Hehe.  
  
(But if you feel you must share your problems then go right ahead)  
  
Marina 


	12. Strange Behavior

Hi Guys, so sorry that it took me this long to write another chapter but I was in other places other than my own home, so I really couldn't have. Anyway...I DO hope you enjoy this, because I will write another chapter following this...only because there is a major twist in the end of this chapter.

BARE WITH ME! And review away.

marina

Strange Behavior

"Hi sweetie, where's Mommy?" he asked with a wacky smile on his face.

"Mommy went out, she said she'd be back in time for dinner, Daddy" Hermione said looking at the T.V screen.

There was a loud crash in the kitchen that made Hermione look in that direction only to find her father searching for something in the cabinets.

"Where is it?" he said with a nervous voice.

"Where's what, Daddy?" she asked.

He quickly rushed over to her and grabbed her shoulders.

"Sweetie, remember when Daddy told you NOT to touch his things" he said with his face inches away from hers.

"I didn't" she barely whispered.

"YOU'RE LYING!" he screamed.

He released her and she quickly ran away from him to the nearest corner. She stood there between the T.V and the closet, away from her fathers reach.

"It makes you m-mad, Daddy" she whispered.

"P-Please...It makes you mad"

He ran up to her and swiftly slapped her hard across her small face.

"ARGG...NO DADDY, DON'T" she screamed.

Hermione awoke from her dream drenched in her own sweat. That was the very first day when she had received her punishment from her very own father, she was eight years old. How she wished that her mother was there that day to see him.

Hermione's mother was never around when he was acting that way. When Hermione got older and adapted to her lifestyle she always wanted to run into her mother's room and tell her. Tell her exactly what her father does. Not just tell her, but show her as well.

Her father made her cover up all her scars and bruises just so his cover wouldn't be blown. She had to waste her time, forming a potion that was strong enough to hide all her bruises.

She found herself looking in the mirror at her own reflection. Her hair was now long and wavy that had a chestnut color to it. Slowly picking up her hand she observed her scar on her right hand.

Those dark days seem to haunt her every night. Stepping into the bathtub she turned on the water and released the vanilla fragrance into the air. Her thoughts wandered off to Draco and she wondered if she can really trust another person.

She's had too many bad experiences with trusting people, especially guys her own age. They say they love you, but do they mean it. They say that you're the only one but are there more.

Girls seem to analyze things more than guys will ever know. She laid there thinking over how nice and sweet he has been. She was afraid that one day he might really hurt her just like Josh. (Hermione was referring to Draco)

She thought that Josh was perfect in every way. Every day he would come by and talk to her and she would open up to him about all her troubles and worries. She would tell him her deepest secrets and her deepest fears.

He knew her all too well.

Hermione wandered off into her room and realized that she had an hour left before she was allowed in the Great Hall for breakfast.

She put on her uniform followed by a robe. Then she walked into her closet and put on her cloak to protect her from the terrible cold that has set upon Hogwarts.

Gently opening the door and trying to make the least bit of sound she exited the Common Room. She walked through the hallways until she finally reached the doors that would open up to the outside.

Her feet swiftly carried her into the deep forest, not knowing where exactly she was going she found herself looking at the most stunningly beautiful lake there ever was. Looking around she found an isolated rock and decided she should magically warm the small space around her to keep her from freezing.

As she was just about to sit down on her rock she saw a glimpse of blond long hair. She immediately rose from her sitting position and edged near it. It was definitely not a person; this was a mysterious creature and a very beautiful one as well.

It was a unicorn.

Once the unicorn saw that she was not scared of him, he came closer to her and gently stroked her tummy.

"Haha...that tickles" she said to the unicorn. She wasn't surprised to find such living thing in the forest.

"I bet no one ever comes to visit you, do they?" she asked.

The unicorn just lowered his head a bit.

"Well...no more worries, I shall come and visit you every so often now." She said with a smile.

"Hmm...Let's see now, what should I call you" she pondered out loud.

"Long beautiful hair, white, and may I say very masculine" at this point the unicorn had straightened his head and showed off his beautiful long neck.

"Hehe...oh now you feel like showing off, do you" she said laughingly.

"Oh you fit so well with someone I know" she said sadly.

"I know...how about I call you D'Artagnan" she said with a half smile on her face.

'D'Artagnan' slightly bent his front legs and bowed his head.

"And I, D'Artagnan am Hermione" she bent her front leg over the other while raising her robe just a tad with her two hands like a formal princess would to a prince.

"You're something beautiful" she said as she patted him on the head.

"I really should head back to the castle now" she said quietly.

D'Artagnan lightly pushed her in that direction where she should go and lowered his head.

"Don't worry, I'll come back" He raised his head and watched her go.

Being with D'Artagnan really gave Hermione so much peace and relaxation; it's almost as if he were Draco. Then her mind drifted off to the Slytherin himself. Hermione was definitely happy but deep down inside she knew that this was not a good idea to get involved with in the first place. Not only has she betrayed her loyal friends but she has betrayed herself.

He was the boy who taunted her about being a muggle-born, he was the one who teased Harry about his parents and Ron about his poorness.

What was she getting herself into?

She walked rapidly back to the castle and knew that it was time for breakfast. Slowly opening the doors to the Great Hall she didn't expect that there would be anybody there so she kept walking straight without giving anyone her attention. As she walked past the Slytherin table she couldn't help but look up and notice at that exact moment that the person who has been constantly on her mind was sitting there all alone looking at his food as if it were poisoned.

"I thought I was the only one up this morning" she said quietly.

She was just about to change her route and go over to him when she heard the doors open followed by a loud cheering and laughter of the Slytherins themselves.

Draco rushed into the Great Hall with nothing but an exhausted face that read 'I haven't slept in days'. He slowly made his way to the Slytherin table, not being in the mood for food he began to analyze what exactly was on his plate. As he was in deep thought about whether the eggs were connected to the bacon, he began to think about something completely different; better yet, someone.

He liked the person he was when she was around. She's turned the tables on him and made him realize something completely out of ordinary. When he thought about her, its like something started tickling his stomach. When he was standing so close to her yesterday, he can smell the lovely vanilla fragrance that she wore. He could smell the shampoo that she used, he studied every little fact about her face, her almond shaped eyes, her perfectly formed nose, and her long wavy hair that felt like silk.

He was very surprised by this reaction only because he has never experienced it before.

He was just used to having girls around, being with them and moving on. No particular feelings such as these.

His thoughts were interrupted when the Great Hall suddenly filled with loud laughter and cheering. He looked up and saw his crew walk over to him followed by the Slytherin girls that attached themselves to the guys as much as possible.

Crabbe and Goyle sat themselves close to Draco and immediately started talking to him about the useless things in the world.

'Man, I can hold a better conversation with a cattle' Draco thought to himself while his minions continuously tattled with each other.

When he looked up he found himself looking over the Gryffindor table searching for his brown haired beauty. Once he found her chatting with her friends he couldn't help but just stare at her natural appearance. It was just so breathtaking.

He noticed she was starting to pack her things slowly and try to excuse herself from the table so he gathered up his books and exited the Great Hall.

Hermione felt that she was in a much better mood after she's talked to Ginny about all the minor things girls talk about these days.

She's also discovered that Ginny has gotten over her little crush and finally moved on, and moved on she did...

Hermione told her friends she had forgotten a book upstairs and excused herself. As she excited the Great Hall she couldn't help but not to look at the Slytherin table and before she knew it she was out of the Great Hall walking down the corridors thinking why she hasn't seen Draco surrounded by his cronies.

Then out of nowhere she felt an arm snake around her waist, she turned swiftly only to be met with those deep blue eyes.

"Agh...You scared me!" she screamed childishly with a smile on her lips.

"Well, I am good at that" he said in return. He put both his hands on her waist and she put her arms around his neck, caressing his hair in the back of his head.

"So where was Ms. Sneaky going?" just before she can reply, he quickly said something to follow that.

"I didn't see you in your room" he finished.

"Hmm...Do tell Mr.Malfoy, what were you doing in my room?" she said with a smirk on her face.

"You know that smirk only does its charm on me" he said ignoring her comment.

"But you are catching on, so I'll give this one to you" he said and returned that smirk.

"So really, where were you going, just now?" he asked with a straight face.

"Oh I just forgot something in our Common Room" she said rapidly, looking away.

"You know, they might believe your pitiful lies, but I on the other hand...do not" he said with a wicked smile on his face.

"Who they- ohh...you mean my friends" she said with applying some stress on the word 'friends'.

"Friends, losers, scar-heads...whatever, it's all the same" he said looking away.

"Listen Malfoy" she said with an exaggeration on his name.

"You might not like them but-"

"What, you do?" he interrupted her.

"Of course I do! That's preposterous!" she said with a serious face. She folded her arms together to show him that she's mad at him.

Draco looked at her and couldn't help but smile. She looked like a nine year old whose candy was stolen and she was fuming. Nevertheless he enjoyed just watching her.

"You're right...I'm sorry, can we go now?" he asked stretching out his arms to her, and to hug her but right before he reached her, she immediately slapped his hands away.

"Just because you don't have friends, doesn't mean that I am not allowed to have any" she said looking away from him, yet still not moving.

She stood there with her arms folded, head turned away from him, and with a left foot out, tapping on the cold stoned floor.

He observed this position and couldn't think of anything else but do what he thought best.

"Alright, since you're mad at me, and obviously don't want to talk to me" he said slowly and calmly.

"I guess I'll have to do what's best" he said with a smirk on his face.

She turned just slightly to peek at him, only because she thought he was going to do something bad to her.

Swiftly in one motion, he picked her up, grabbing both of her legs and throwing her over his shoulder.

"ARGG...DRACO MALFOY, YOU PUT ME DOWN THIS INSTANT!" she screamed.

"Easy woman and stop your wild kicking...it would make the process a lot easier" he said.

He walked slowly back to the Common Room and said the password.

By this time Hermione had stopped kicking and just enjoyed the ride up the long stairs.

He slowly and gently put her down coming up with a smile on his face.

"I hope your back will ache!" she said quietly starring right at him.

"Sure will, with all that weight on my shoulder" he said.

"How much do you weight anyway...felt like I was carrying a horse" he said with a serious face. Then he turned away from her and walked to his room with a satisfying smile.

'I'll give her 5 seconds' he thoughts.

Immediately right after he sat on his bed, his bedroom door flied opened and he was met with an enraged Hermione.

"I DO NOT weight THAT much" she said.

All Draco could really do was sit on his bed and just watch Hermione without smiling so she would think that he was actually listening to her carry on about how 'silly' it was of him to carry her up the stairs and that she prays that his back will hurt just so he can learn a lesson.

Here and then, whenever she would stop for a pause, that was his chance to say,

'Mm-hmm' and 'That's right'.

Other than that he would just watch how her crimped locks of hair would fall out of her messy ponytail that she made early in the morning and gently into her eyes and she would simply ignore the pieces of hair that are now caressing a small part of her face. As she would walk a little to the right, the sun would softly touch her face, making it glow with her natural sun-kissed skin tone. She talked for only a minute but in Draco's mind, its as if he was playing a tape in his head and slow motioning it just so he can get every bit of her and try not to miss a thing.

"Are you listening to me?" she asked him, breaking all signs of day dreaming.

"Draco, are you sure you're okay...You had a really weird face just a minute ago" she said with an unpleased tone.

"What...oh-yeh, no, I'm all right" he said now in his normal mood.

"All right, well I'll have to run into my room and get something." She said quickly rushing out of his room.

He got up from the bed and felt himself feeling a little sick. He slowly walked to his desk drawer and started searching for something.

His head was now throbbing with serious painful shots. He couldn't find it.

"No" he said quietly. He quickly opened the next drawer.

"It has to be here" He said louder.

Looking up at the mirror in front of him, he lost all sense of control. He started to shake dreadfully yet still searching for whatever it was that he needed.

"You-Can't-Control—Me" he said through gritted teeth.

"Where is it?" she screamed.

Hermione heard crashes and screams coming from his room so she quickly ran over there.

"Now Draco, what was the problem that you had to screa-?" she was stopped by the terrible look on his face.

"Oh my god, you are sick" she said as she rushed over to him.

She started asking questions but all he could do was stare at her.

"Draco, you're shaking" she said quietly.

He shook his head and opened his eyes wider as if to see who was standing in front of him. A sense of realization hit him in the head and he finally understood that it was Hermione.

He violently grabbed her wrist and started to hurt her.

"Draco, let go" she said loudly.

"Get out....now" he said dangerously low.

He forced himself to let go of her hand and turned away from her as if not to hurt her. He rushed back to the shelves and started to again search for something.

"WHERE IS IT?" He roared.

Hermione stood there dumbstruck with memories and flashbacks attacking her mind.

FLASHBACK

"Where is it?" he said with a nervous voice.

"Where's what, Daddy?" she asked.

He quickly rushed over to her and grabbed her shoulders.

"Sweetie, remember when Daddy told you NOT to touch his things" he said with his face inches away from hers.

"I didn't" she barely whispered.

"YOU'RE LYING!" he screamed.

END FLASHBACK

"AGHH...no, not again." She found herself on the floor of Draco's room.

She quickly examined the room, looking for any signs of blond hair. Hermione stood up and walked around a bit only to find nothing but his things being thrown around everywhere. She came to a conclusion that he had somehow left and began to panic.

'What was wrong with him...It's as if he was being controlled' She thought to herself.

Then she heard movement in the bathroom. She rushed over there to find Draco laying on the floor, scared and bloodied as if he had the worst beating of a lifetime.

Hermione gasped suddenly and put two of her hands on her head as if to think what to do.

"Draco" she whimpered.

There he laid, with bruises and cuts over his wrists, long crimson red lines over his whole back. His clothes now absorbing the blood that is gently crawling its way out of the deep cuts on his wrists. He lay there motionless and unspoken, peaceful and untouched and in the worst condition of his life.

Hermione's body was paralyzed. She knew exactly what has happened to him and there was no way she could ever help.

Tears now rolling down her cheeks, her knees gave away and she slid down the wall of the Head Boys bathroom.


	13. Time To Tell the Truth

Time To Tell the Truth

(Ch.16)

-Previously on Ch.15-

"Draco" she whimpered.

There he laid, with bruises and cuts over his wrists, long crimson red lines over his whole back. His clothes now absorbing the blood that is gently crawling its way out of the deep cuts on his wrists. He lay there motionless and unspoken, peaceful and untouched and in the worst condition of his life.

Hermione's body was paralyzed. She knew exactly what has happened to him and there was no way she could ever help.

Tears now rolling down her cheeks, her knees gave away and she slid down the wall of the Head Boys bathroom.

-Now on Ch.16-

"How could this be?" she asked quietly.

"How could this happen to...him?" was the follow up question.

She sat there on the floor, hands hugging her weak knees and head resting on the top of them.

Unspoken, untouched she left him alone and went to her room.

She closed the door to her room and went directly to her drawer. Her uncontrolled hands instantly started to search for something, rather, an object.

Under so many things like make-up, scrolls of parchment, clothes, underwear, there it laid, her most important but not as important as the rest, item of all. She grabbed this mysterious and round looking object and went directly out of her room and right into the bathroom of the Head Boy.

When she entered he had already been awake, just sitting there with his eyes shut like he was still in pain.

When he heard movement he instantly opened his eyes to find Hermione standing there with a bottle in her hands. Instantaneously he grabbed the closest towel on the floor and tried to cover up his body.

"Don't" she whispered.

He looked in her eyes with pain and fear most of all as if asking and pleading with his own eyes.

"It only hurts you" she said a little louder, her eyes locking with his.

Without looking away from him she opened the bottle and took out two pills went over to the sink and filled a cup with water.

She sat right by him.

"Here...it will help" she said in a nice angelic voice.

"How do you—"he started only to be interrupted by her.

"I just—guessed" she said without looking at him.

"Draco...you really scared me yesterday" she said in a lowered voice with a sudden interest of the patterns on the floor.

"I told you to...go" he said.

"And I meant it"

"Why" she said a little louder.

"What would have happened if you got just a little more out of control" now with tears in her eyes.

"I know what's wrong with you, Draco" she said quieter now and with a deep concentration on his eyes.

He looked away, as If trying to think of a reason to cover up.

"You don't have to lie to me" she said.

"Oh yeah?" "And do tell me, why's that?" he said in an angry tone.

"Is it because you just want to 'help me' or what? You want to become some angel that everyone will always remember, huh?" he raised his voice.

"Just like Saint Potter" he whispered under his breath.

"I tried to help you" she said dangerously quietly.

"Hermione I---I didn't mean it ----in that way" he tried to form a sentence.

"Then tell me what's wrong, what's really going on?" she said with pleading eyes.

"Do you, or do you not, use the ---concealment charm?" she said with a worried face almost wanting to hear him say 'yes'.

He immediately looked in her eyes.

"Yes" "But---how did you know" he said with an amazed tone.

For a minute, Hermione tried to look anywhere but his beseeching eyes.

She looked down, as if ashamed of herself and quietly whispered.

"I use it--as well"

Draco's eyes widened in shock and he started to look all over her body, trying to see if she is right.

"But I--"

"I use...the Advanced Concealment...which gets me through 48 hours" she said not looking at him.

"Her—Mione...why do you—why do you...need it?" he asked in an unsure voice, not knowing if it was appropriate.

"Promise if I tell you my story...you'll fess up and tell me yours" she said still avoiding his eyes.

"I don't think you'll want to—"

"Just promise, Draco" she interrupted him.

"Uhh—of course...yeah" he said.

She inhaled a deep breath and closed her eyes for just that second only to open them up again and face him.

"We were all happy and—together until my mother died in a car accident and after that, my—my world came crashing down, I guess" she said with tears forming in her eyes.

"There hasn't been a single day gone by when I haven't thought of what would have happened if she were alive. How I would have turned out, and how...happy I would have been"

"My dad...started to drink and I used to hide it from him...silly girl, right" she said with a fake laugh.

"He would find out and get even more angry" she said with flashes of images running through her head.

IMAGE

"WHERE IS IT, YOU STUPID GIRL" his boisterous voice rang through her tender ears.

END IMAGE

"And then...he'd get away from me and start to look for it" she said now with tears pouring slowly out of her eyes.

IMAGE

"DADDY DON'T!" the little girl screamed. She ran, as far away from him as she could. She went up to her room and locked herself in there.

"OPEN THIS DOOR!" he screamed.

"please...make him go away...make him go away...make him go away...make him go away...make him go away...make him—"the door has been smashed open with his whole body weight put on it.

"I'm gonna teach you NOT to lie to your Daddy" he said coming closer to her.

END IMAGE

"So...that's been going on for a while now" she said avoiding his eyes and getting up quickly, trying to escape his presence.

"No...no—I don't buy that" he said.

"What do you mean—that's the truth...I've told you everything." She said with an awe in her voice.

"Oh really...so I guess your dad's beatings got you this way." He said louder getting up too so she wouldn't have to look down on him.

"I guess all this hatred and coldness you have towards guys is because of him. I'm sorry Hermione but you're going to have to tell me the whole story...if there even is a story" he said looking at her.

"What? You think I made that up just now?" she said getting mad at him.

Draco stood there with arms crossed against his chest looking at her.

"No...I just know that you're still holding onto something...something that may have even been worse than your Dad. Something so far off that maybe you don't ever want to TALK about it again, something that you don't ever want to THINK about. Something that maybe haunts your dreams at night and you even start to see things around school that terrify you---"

"He raped me" she whispered.

Draco's face dropped, his mouth slightly opened, his eye brows formed a straight line, his heart started to race and skip a beat every so often now. Unable to move he spoke.

"Your d—dad" he asked, almost not wanting to hear the truth anymore.

"No...my first boyfriend, the only boyfriend I ever had...until—well" she motioned to him and he nodded.

"That's why sometimes, it scares me what you're thinking, why your touching my hair or smelling it for that matter" she said with a fake laugh.

"Who is he?" Draco didn't hear anything she said after she mentioned that it was her boyfriend who did it.

"Well...he doesn't-"

"WHO IS HE?" He said it much louder this time.

"HE'S A MUGGLE" She screamed back at him.

"He's a –muggle?" he repeated, saying the word muggle with disgust.

"Those fucking twats...What the hell are you doing hanging out with them anyway Hermione?" He said looking at her with a sad expression.

"My parents are also muggles, Draco" she said.

"Yeah...and look at your father" he instantly replied back.

"Im sorry, I didn't—mean it that way"

"I'm just so—what's his name?" he rapidly asked.

"Draco...that's not necessary-"

"What's the twats name Hermione...darling" he said trying to keep his anger low.

"Josh"

"What kind of a normal mother names her child Josh?"

"With a name like that, you know something's wrong with the boy" he said walking around the bathroom room so quickly almost wanting to go out into a bigger room than the bathroom. He took one more step and finally stopped only to follow up with another question.

"When did he—when did it---how did it happen?" he asked.

"He liked me at first but-" she said.

"WHAT? Hermione...all guys 'like' you at first, then they want something from you, well at least HE wanted something from you."

Draco was enraged. He had such feelings mixed up that he didn't even know which was stronger, anger or jealousy. He was jealous of the fact that there even was a boyfriend. He wanted her all to himself but when she said this he just didn't expect to react the way he did. He had many girlfriends so why couldn't she have a boyfriend? This was the selfish thought running through his head.

"Does he know you're a witch?" he asked.

"I don't know...he and Dad used to always talk together...and only until all the way at the end did I find out about their 'secret' relationship." she said now looking on the floor.

"What do you mean?"

"My dad—

IMAGE

"You didn't think I was in on it all alone did you?" Josh whispered in her ear.

END IMAGE

"He sent him" she said in barely a voice.

IMAGE

"How could—It was him" she said looking into the boys eyes. The boy who had just come back to tell her he'd never leave her alone, this lying, abhorrent, and heinous person who she had trusted with all her heart.

She's told him all her miseries, all her troubles, all the problems with her father who was in fact getting the information all along.

He was a disgusting person not to mention a sneak. She could barely look him in the eye. Hermione was not ready for what was about to happen when all of the sudden the bedroom door closed and Josh started edging closer to her.

END IMAGE

With watery eyes, she stood there paralyzed from the painful images that still flash in her mind, she closed her eyes sharply and put her hands on her eyes to wipe away the warm drops of tears that have just emerged from her almond shaped eyes.

"Your own father sent him" he said quietly trying hard not to upset her even more.

"Yes" she put her hands down, giving up on wiping them away. Draco thought it wasn't necessary to go on further so he got straight into the point.

"So he knows you're a witch"

"And he probably knows that you're not 'some' witch, you're a very powerful one as well?" he was more asking himself.

"And of course this whole thing comes down to only one thing...he knows where you go to school, Daddy must have mentioned that somewhere didn't he?" He said lastly and stood there in one spot.

Draco looked around and almost forgot that Hermione was still standing there.

"He knows I'm a witch...and he does know where my school is located." She said not looking at him but out the window and into the deep dark forest.

"And how do you know all this--"

"Because he said he'd never leave me alone---and he hasn't...ever since"

"On the first day of school, I came across a rose on my bed and I know it was from—him" she said quietly still looking into the forest.

"That could have been from any--"

"It was a black rose" she whispered.

"The day he told me 'he's never leave me' he left me a black rose and its as if it was never touched...the same...exact one...it's almost magical"

"Hermione...I'd never let him touch you—ever again. Do you hear me?" he said standing by her now and putting his hand on her shoulder.

FLASHBACK

"I'll never ever let him get you, Hermione....Never....You belong with me....Belong....Me....Never let him get you...You belong with me....with me...with me...Hermione" he stared deeply into her eyes.

She was a foolish girl, believing him, trusting him, and most of all loving him.

END FLASHBACK

These fresh words have chimed through her ears as soon as he had said that line.

"He said the same exact thing...except he meant my dad" she turned on her heel and swiftly went away.

Right before exiting his bathroom, without looking back at him she said in a quiet voice...

"There are some things we shouldn't know in life...I think you should just forget what I have said" and with that final statement she cleared from the view and out of his presence.

"Its kind of hard" he said to himself.

Hermione went into her room locked the door and carried herself to the bed. She laid there thinking over and over about anything but Josh and her father but nothing seems to work.

Only a few hours have gone by until she had noticed something on her desk, a letter.

She went over there and examined it.

-Hermione Granger- Was written on the envelope itself.

She carefully opened it and read...

All is fair in Love and War

-The one you fear

Special thanks to...

Midnite-Goddess: Thank you for the courageous compliment but I do not think I'm worth it. Maybe one day...when I see my name on a hard back cover of a novel. (hehe...hopefully)

PineappleCube: I will definetly write an e-mail back as soon as I can. BTW..why hasn't 'someone' written another chapter????

Glad you loved it...hope you guys will like this one just as much If not more.

It was kinda sad...but bare with me, it will get better and hopefully more interesting.

Write as much reviews as you want, I love to read and I love to hear what you have to say.

marina


	14. The Effect Of the Rose

The Effect Of the Rose

Ch.14

-Previously on Ch.13-

All is fair in Love and War

-The one you fear-

-Now on Ch.14-

Trembling hands have grabbed this piece of parchment and carried it over to drawer, a far, far, drawer, away from anyone sight, away from prying eyes.

Hermione edging closer and closer to the drawer wondered who's they might be and if it was the right thing she was doing.

'What if it is him?' she thought with fear running through her veins.

'What will happen if he knows I'm avoiding him' 'Don't be silly...it's probably not even him' 'Just some first year doing one of their pranks'

She opened the drawer, put the parchment in and quickly shut it, as if afraid to see what's inside.

But Hermione knew all too well what was hidden inside that drawer. Her most dangerous possession of all along with the most deadliest. For her it was kind of hard to decide which was worse, the blade or the rose.

She sat there deciding what to do next, walk over to her bed and pretend like nothing happened, go on her balcony and write something down in her diary, or should she go to bed and cry herself to sleep.

She can of course pretend nothing happened but it has and what's the point in writing in that silly book of hers anymore, it doesn't help, it doesn't solve, it's a neutral friend. And last of all crying herself to sleep wasn't always her choice of fun but it has been her choice which she rather chose quiet often.

Gently and slowly she crossed her legs together and opened the drawer that has just been shut seconds ago. Her eyes jumped to the long velvet stick figure that laid there neighboring the black rose. Instantaneously her fragile fingers traced the petals of the rose. As If unable to touch it, she holds back and thinks twice about actually picking it up.

Seconds later, her warm hand wraps itself around the surface of the black rose. Gently, as if it is frail, she picks it up. To think, one would get rid of something so deadly to her. But she couldn't find it in her heart to get rid of something so beautiful and so enticing. It immediately attracts her attention as well as her incidence.

'Why did I think such an exotic thing can be so deadly?' she asked herself and innocent question.

She brings it closer to her nose and smells the tantalizing warmth of this deadly rose. Closing her eyes, she's fallen into ecstasy, into this rapturous bliss. The smell, the touch, the feeling of this toxic object has made her fanatical.

Fighting the urge to stay there longer she pulls it away from her and brings it down to her lap. She finds her senses and releases this deadly object that has hypnotized her just seconds away. She could have gone completely insane, she could have mentally lost her mind if it wasn't for her strong ness building up inside her, running through her veins, combating the powerful urge to stay there, in that world of independence.

'Now I remember' she thought.

She looks around, searching for the rose only to find it near the bathroom door where she threw it. She picked it up and carried it over to it's previous location, the far drawer. Opening the drawer her eyes glanced at the velvet object that was now accompanied by a piece of parchment. She laid the rose right across the parchment and the blade as if to guard it and keep it away, for her own good.

Swiftly closing the drawer she got up to her feet and walked over to her bed.

'How will I explain myself to Dumbledore for missing so many classes?' she thought to herself.

'I really should concentrate on my work, after all I do want to get out of my house and get a good job and live all by myself, don't I?' she asked herself.

'Yep...all by myself...I'll be living all alone' 'Wont that be a nice change for a while' She thought sadly.

Right as she was thinking this she heard a tap on the window. Looking out she saw Karnog, Ginny's owl, with a letter attached to it.

'That remind me, I should go and visit D'Artagnan' she thought at the sight of him.

"Well, what do you have for me, Karnog?" she asked softly.

She opened the letter and it read...

Come down here, we hardly ever talk anymore. What's wrong? I want to know.

-Ginny-

She smiled a bit and petted the owl as if telling it to go, and right at that moment Karnog spun around and disappeared into the foggy night.

Hermione closed her window and started to get dressed. She wore her fitted yet loose jeans and a regular shirt followed by a sweater just to keep her nice and warm.

As she walked over to her dresser she started to notice dark circles appearing under her eyes.

'It's only a matter of time until they actually go away and never appear again' she thought to herself.

She took two pills of Advanced Concealment and gulped it down with water. By gently applying a light layer of make-up she concealed herself pretty good. The make-up gave her a natural looking glow, the one that stood out as healthy rather than what she really was.

Bringing her hair in a messy bun she looked around the room remembering what she forgot to take.

She quietly walked out of her room and started to go down the stairs. She was somewhere in the middle of the Common Room when she had noticed Draco staring at her through his book that he was supposedly reading.

Without showing any emotion, Draco looked back down in his book and turned the page. Hermione was glad for his reaction only because she couldn't deal with her memories anymore. She thought that maybe he was giving her some space to breath, whatever it was, it suited her for now.

She reached the Gryffindor Common Room stated the password and walked in on Harry and Ron having a match at chess.

Harry instantly looked up followed by Ron who's King has just beaten Harry's Queen.

Without them seeing her, she quickly ran up to the Girls Dormitories only to be met with an upset Ginny.

"What's wrong?" Hermione asked.

"You were suppose to be here a minute ago" she said no longer able to keep a straight face and bust out laughing. Hermione joined in and relaxed immediately.

"Ahh...I miss this" She said without knowing it.

"Miss what Mione?" Ginny asked.

"What...Oh—just this warmth and comfortableness. It's very soothing, I guess" she said.

After what seemed like ages. They both finally admitted that they were tired and said their 'good nights' to one another.

As Hermione was coming out she heard her name being called out so she instantly looked back to find Seamus standing there with his tousled hair, white sleep shirt and some slacks, looking at her with no expression on his face.

"Yeah...what's up?" she asked quietly only because everyone's gone off to bed and she didn't want to raise her voice.

"Well, it's just that—Hermione, why don't you ever come to us anymore. I remember in previous years when you were prefect you still had time for all of us, even me for that matter." He said, she immediately felt bad for not being with them like she used to.

"I –uh" she started.

"I don't know anything about you anymore. I don't even know if you've got yourself a nice looking lad, nothing. We haven't been up to date on anything." He said quietly.

As soon as he mention the part about her finding herself a nice 'lad' she instantly thought about Draco and what's he doing right this moment as she's speaking to her best friend.

"But Hermione...the thing is...I want to be"

"You see, if I didn't care, I wouldn't have even bothered. But I do" he said soothingly.

"Seamus...I'm so sorry. I had no idea that me not being in contact with you has meant so much." She replied back at him.

"I've just had so much to deal with lately that I don't want to even bore you." She said trying to find an excuse for getting out of this situation.

"What problems?" He asked right away.

"Well...there not as complicated as I make it sound, but they are problems" she said, still searching for an excuse. She really didn't want to make another mistake and tell another person about what's really been going on. She thought it was bad enough that Draco had already known, not to mention others already suspects.

"Hermione...it's nothing I wont be able to handle" he said.

"Wait..." he said all of the sudden.

"Are you ---pregnant?" he said with a screwed up face, wanting to hear her shout a loud 'NO'.

All of the sudden the tension has completely dropped and Hermione burst out laughing.

"You—really—think—I'm—pregnant?" she said in between laughs.

"Well I don't know, I mean we've been talking about everything and suddenly we just stopped so I thought maybe you had some 'lady' problems." He said with a slight smile.

"Oh Seamus it's definitely not that" she said with a smile on her face.

"That's what I wanted to see all along, that beautiful smile that you hide every so often" he said sweetly.

"Why are you being so overly sweet?"

"I-uhh—I don't know...why haven't you come down here and actually talked to us?" he switched the question on her. All along stepping backwards and running a hand through his now medium length hair.

"All right...I'll make a deal with you...I'll come down here only if you start to come out and actually talk to me. Because lately it seems as though you're the one who's actually

igno--"

"All right then, no problem." He interrupted her.

Hermione raised her eye brows a bit, surprised by his quick answer.

"All right then, Good Night, Seamus" she said and quickly walked out of the Gryffindor.

'Now there's a strange boy' she thought to herself.

She walked up to the Head Boy/Girl Common Room and stated the password.

Walking in, she didn't expect it to become so cold and dark. For some apparent reason, in the Gryffindor Common Room, it was always warm and light, rather than the opposite.

She went over to the main entrance and said a quick spell to raise the Temperature and make it just a bit lighter.

'There, that's better' she thought.

As she almost reached the bottom of the steps she glanced over to where Draco was sitting only to find his seat empty.

A sad and cold feeling ran through her and she couldn't explain why. She walked over there and sat exactly where he sat before. This was his Slytherin armchair. Her, Gryffindor armchair stood right across from it. She traced the arms of the chair knowing that his strong but pale arms have rested here just moments ago. The seat was rather warm comparing to everything else, almost inviting, so she knew he must have left just minutes ago.

She looked around and found an interesting book laying around on the near by table.

'This was the book he was reading' she thought to herself.

She took it in her hands and as she brought it closer to read something the smell of the book came rushing at her with high speed. It was the spicy smell of his cologne. It was really worth smelling, for her at least.

She brought it close to her face and closed her eyes as the smell entered her lungs and captured it there. Realized what she had just done she quickly put the book down and stood up from the seat, muttering something like 'crazy' and 'complete psycho' to herself.

Walking up and out of her Common Room she entered her room and never came out again for the night.

Hermione was completely unaware that someone was watching her every move. At that exact moment, a dark figure emerged from the shadows and came into the light. His muscular hands crushing the metal rail, nerviness has taken over him.

"She smelled it" was all that he said to himself.

And without a second later, he vanished into the dark.

END OF CHAPTER 14


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